A Shot at Love with Temari?
by Aquatity Angel
Summary: ShikaTema;mostly. Base is similar idea as "A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila." Temari of the Sand has to pick one of these people as a date by the end of this. Nara Shikamaru would rather just go home; so troublesome. But then again... FINISHED!
1. Prologue: They said WHAT?

**A Shot At Love with...Temari?**

Author Note: Okay, so this Fanfic is based around the "Shot at Love With Tila Tequila" reality series- the one reality series I actually liked-- even though it did not end the way I wanted-- but with Naruto Characters. For those who never saw the show but can't resist a good Naruto Fanfic, it is essentially this: 1 bisexual girl with an even of number straight males and lesbians all vying for her attention/love, each eliminated slowly weekly. I know a lot of this will seem very out of character for those Naruto characters involved... but I'm the Author! Bwahaaha! So I can rule in this realm. So there.

In a final note before I start this one off, I don't own "A Shot at Love," nor do I own "Naruto." Those belong, respectively, to MTV and/or VH1 (depending on the season) and Kishimoto-Sensei. I just own my ridiculous situations. :)

However, if either one wanted to give me the rights to their work... I wouldn't mind. XD

**Prologue: They said WHAT?!**

"Got it," Temari grumpily sighed as she pushed her straw-blond hair past her eyes. "So essentially I'm doing this to find a date...?"

The older blond with the low pigtails sighed, adjusting her seat. Why was this so frustrating for Temari to understand? "Right."

"But, Tsunade-sama, I don't want a date with any of the Konoha boys. Or girls. I'm completely into this independence part of my life right no--"

"Liar," Tsunade interrupted. "You wanted a way to get to know the Konoha folk, and a date is just the thing that will do it. So we've decided to make it a little more interesting, with a sort of competition so that you can choose someone you'll actually get along with for a set period time."

Temari grinned her devilish smirk. Tsunade barely managed to withhold rolling her eyes. Kids these days. "I guess that'd work. If I HAVE TO pick somebody to go on this date with, I might as well have some fun with the decision."

Hmmph. "That's not all there is to it," Tsunade added suspiciously as Temari raised an eyebrow. "Actually, your brothers--"

"My BROTHERS?" Figures they'd be involved.

"Yes. You know, the puppet boy and the Kazekage? Anyway, they seem to think you could actually fall for someone on this excursion, and they were mentioning you being in need of...some company..." The curvaceous Fifth Hokage paused to take a sip from her tea.

"So basically, my DEAR brother Gaara and my CARING brother Kankurou want me to GET LAID?!"

Tsunade had barely managed not to do a spit take with her tea at that. "Well, their actual words were, 'fall in love,' and 'settle down,' respectively."

So that's what they were up to, huh? "I'll do this competition. But I'm not gonna fall in love or anything." She confidently swished her body around, in an air of complete--well, arrogance-- a way no one else could do in front of the Fifth Hokage without feeling at least a little intimidated. "So see you later," she called as she walked out of Tsunade's office.

Tsunade sighed again. At this rate, it would take a miracle for anyone to willingly fall into THAT deathtrap.


	2. Week One: Figure It Out

**Week One: Figure It Out**

Author Note: Ready for the competition, everyone? Please be prepared, because pairings I like may or may not crop up during this. I am the all-ruling author of this story, after all. ;3

I don't own Naruto or Shot at Love with Tila Tequila. The Competition Idea for this chapter came from the first week of "A Shot at Love 2." But I modified it.

I would also like to point out that this is a warped timeline of Naruto. So characters that would normally be, oh, say, DEAD, or in desperate desire to kill each other, not to mention any names (cough UCHIHA cough) will show up, too. Ain't I fun? ;)

...

Eight boys. Eight girls. One Temari. She sighed as she looked out at everybody enjoying the pool area that was being provided for this event.

This. Was. DUMB.

They had announced the purpose of this event and everything; a surprising number of people had applied. Really, SIXTEEN of the people of Konoha wanted to date her? Temari knew she was good looking, but please.

Contemplating that is when she realized the error in the wording: competition. Crap. That explained why so many were here. Sure, some of them might actually enjoy a date with her; Sakura was always very friendly and Naruto liked attention, but she was surprised at who had shown.

Hmm... Matsuri was there, probably as a friendly gesture. It was a last second decision of Tsunade's to (THANK GOD) allow non-Konoha residents. Hinata and Shizune seemed just really nice in general. And Ino and Temari actually got along, so a night on the town with her wouldn't be so bad. She didn't really know the dark haired Kin Tsuchi, and had NO CLUE why Tayuya was there-- probably the competition aspect. TenTen, now SHE just wants a rematch, that was for sure. And Sakura was there, of course.

Then there were the boys. Temari was pretty sure Naruto was there without a clue what was going on. Inuzuka Kiba likely was just competitive; she didn't know him all that well. She knew from Gaara that Rock Lee could turn anything into a challenge. Someone probably told Akimichi Chouji there'd be free food (which there was; he had found the barbeque early on), and she knew just enough about Sasuke and Itachi to know this was a competition issue for them, as well. Hyuga Neji kind of surprised her; she knew very little about him except that...well, at least he was good looking. And then-- she was especially surprised to see Nara Shikamaru. Why would that lazy crybaby be here, of all places?

Might as well kick this thing off. Temari adjusted her purple bathing suit, not wanting to show more than was necessary--just enough to invoke some drool-- as she walked out onto the balcony. "Allllllllright, everybody!" As she spoke the talking quieted down; when everyone looked up at her, Temari realized she did like this attention being focused on her. Maybe she could govern Suna sometime and let Gaara relax. "You all know why you're here, and it's all about ME!" She flashed her most carefree smile, knowing that could disarm most anybody. "Each week I will give out a key to those of you I want to stay. Problem is, each week, I'll have fewer keys to give out, and those without a key, get to leave."

Oh, yeah, this kind of power made Temari feel pretty in control.

She liked it.

"First things first. I have a little surprise set up for you all, around the house, so I'll meet you at the East Side." She heard a couple cheers and a couple groans about leaving the nice little party, and went around to meet them all on that side of the house.

...

"What... do... you think... she's planning?" Chouji asked through bites of barbeque.

Nara Shikamaru shrugged his thin shoulders. He could never manage to have much of an appetite when Chouji was eating. The chubby guy was his best friend but jeez... borrowing a phrase Ino might say: 'ew.' "I don't know. You'd think she'd be nice enough to just get on with this whole thing..." He let out a yawn... one of those free towels was looking like an awful nice pillow right about now. "...troublesome woman..."

Shikamaru dragged himself along with the others to the East Side of the building, after stopping to correct Naruto's directions, of course. You would think the obnoxious blond would have had enough common sense to follow everybody else...then again... whatever. Naruto was lucky Shikamaru was around.

The lazy brunette's normally narrow eyes widened when they reached the other side. Two gigantic cages had taken over the area, one a baby blue and the other an obnoxious-pink.

Temari reappeared at a doorway in between and to the background of the cages. He had to admit she did look good in the deep lavender bikini... not too much skin showing like Ino, not all modest like Hinata. But the Lazy Ninja had his own reasons for being here: well, one anyway. And it really didn't have to do with Temari of the Sand.

"Alllllriiigght!" the Sand Kunoichi grinned that toothy smile of hers. Shikamaru had an idea of something his father had said once, but the thought slipped through his mind too quickly to really take root in his memory. Whatever. "This is the first contest. The boys will be going into the blue cage; the girls into the pink. Then, I'M going to play some music, and you all are going to show me your moves!" Shikamaru groaned, annoyed, but noticed a couple of the girls happily already beginning their routines. As well as Lee starting something...that...well...sorta looked like dancing. "I'll be choosing which group has the SEXIEST of the dances!" ...So troublesome.

"The winning gender gets to come inside and spend some alone time with me, and the other gets stuck out in the cage. Oh, the losers'll be allowed back in, but their time with me will be spent with everyone else as well."

Shikamaru grinned to himself. "Geez, she thinks that's some kind of prize?" he muttered, making Chouji let out a laugh and a little barbeque sauce.

Chouji wiped his mouth clean. Not that it would do much good next time he got a hold of some food, but whatever. "Actually, I'm kind of excited about this whole thing," the glutton spoke candidly. "I know you don't like her much, Shikamaru-kun, but well... she'd be a pretty girlfriend, anyway. If a little moody."

A little? Shikamaru smiled at his friend. "Best of luck then, Chouji. You got as good a chance as anybody does."

...

Temari opened the cages, and the groups began to walk into their confinement.

She locked the cages on the doors. Temari could tell from the current reactions she would probably like the girls' side better. The guys had what seemed like two moods: nervous or stupid. The girls looked pretty excited.

She started some music-- nothing too sexy or gender oriented, just some pop/rock/techno instrumental stuff-- club music, really.

She was right.

Temari generally considered herself straight but open to discussion-- this was a little different. Ino was taking advantage of one of the poles of the cages, slowing down just the right amount to the beat. Tayuya and Tsuchi danced with each other, Tsuchi picking up on the rap of the beat but blending seamlessly with the melodies of which Tayuya was feeding. Tenten was actually quite graceful, closing her eyes and dancing a little offbeat, but in an athletic sort of way. Shizune was smiling to herself, obviously aware of her age advantage in knowing certain dance moves. Sakura had taken it upon herself to form a little cheer-up mission; she was holding one hand each of Matsuri and Hinata's, trying to get them more into it. Matsuri was doing okay, but Temari figured she was just a little self-conscious about her bathing suit. Only Hinata seemed to be scared, shuffling her feet a bit, but probably nervous to be so close to the others who were obviously less hindered.

Temari looked back at the boys' cage; she almost had to stifle a laugh. Whatever Kiba was doing he must have thought was cool. It wasn't. He didn't look too bad-- he was a fairly tone guy, but he was clearly trying too hard. Naruto was... well, several beats ahead of the music, though Temari was appreciative of his maturing pecs for the first time. Chouji was trying really hard, but she felt bad for him; she actually did think he was kind of cute even with the extra weight, but he was uneven with his bravado versus his shyness, and that bothered her. Shikamaru literally was doing nothing; he looked like he had fallen asleep against one of the corner bars... lazy crybaby. She wasn't quite positive WHAT Lee was doing, but he at least seemed to be having fun.

Out of the boys, the Uchihas and the Hyuga seemed to have gotten it down. The Uchihas moved smoothly, if not terribly informed of technical dance, and Neji, of course, had very good control of his movement, almost in a TaiChi fashion. While those three were mildly nice to watch, she decided to turn back to the girls.

She had been watching Ino particularly for a couple moments, who had started trying to drag Shizune into the dance with the pole, when a bunch of noises broke out from nowhere. Well, not nowhere-- the boys' cage. Sasuke and Itachi were yelling at each other. Everybody kind of calmed down their dancing to watch, and Temari ran to the cage. "Hey! HEY! Cut it OUT!" she yelled over all the commotion. Now it seemed Naruto had somehow gotten involved, but through all the yelling she wasn't sure what had happened.

The next couple things happened so quickly, Temari hadn't dared blink. Itachi grabbed Sasuke by the throat and pushed him up against the bars. Naruto jumped at Itachi, who carelessly tossed him aside, Neji yelled something that sounded threatening, Lee tried to get past the awed Chouji, Kiba started to laugh, and then...

Suddenly Itachi was in a calm position, backed away from and put down Sasuke, then walked himself to stand with all the others between him and his gasping little brother. Temari was only confused a moment.

Then she saw the shadow leading between Shikamaru and Itachi. She smiled inwardly. Shikamaru released Itachi, who grouchily decided to remain quiet the rest of the time.

"You guys don't have to fight, you know. Not yet anyway. The girls were gonna win," the Lazy Ninja muttered as he sat himself down, his chakra likely spent.

Temari saw this as her opportunity to talk. "...Uuh... Right! The Girls win!" Some nervous cheers flew from the pink cage. "And if there will be no more FIGHTING" --She shot a glance at Itachi-- "then I'll just take them inside and let you guys in later." The Sand Kunoichi opened the pink cage and led the girls inside.

...

Shikamaru could feel every eye in the boys' cage either on him or nervously avoiding him. He had closed his eyes to rest; it was not easy to use shadow possession on someone as strong as Itachi. But all that fighting in such an enclosed space? He didn't exactly want to be hit randomly from a fight he wasn't even involved in originally.

"Hey... uum... Shikamaru-kun..." He heard Naruto mutter. He pried an eye open to look at the blond.

"Hmmph?" he grunted.

"...Thanks for helping out there..." Naruto thanked, plopping down next to him.

"Whatever. It's no big deal, I just didn't want to get hit in the fracas," he answered in his usual sleepy tones. Shikamaru glanced between Itachi and Sasuke. "Didn't you guys realize that fighting in a small, enclosed space wouldn't end well?" He rolled his neck and closed his eyes again. "...And I thought the Uchiha were supposed to be mature."

"Well, at any rate," he heard Neji respond, "we didn't seem to be doing very well. This should be an interesting competition. I had no idea the girls would have such... control."

"Heh," Kiba laughed. "'Control?' HOT, you mean. Didn't any of you see what was going on in the pink cage?" He let out a slightly realistic but short howl. "When did the girls of Konoha become such babes?"

"I noticed that a LONG time ago!" Naruto laughed. "But...uh... I was trying to help us win."

"Well, I, for one, believe our effort was outstanding and greatly displayed our appreciation for Temari-San!" Lee announced.

"I guess so."

Shikamaru opened his eyes and looked up. Chouji had muttered the last line, and he sounded pretty upset. "Hey, man, what's up?" he asked.

Chouji was looking away from him, but Shikamaru could feel his frustration. "At least one of us...didn't even try at all."

Shikamaru was taken aback. "Uuh... look, Chouji." He sighed. Guess Chouji really wanted this shot. "I'm just trying to make the decision for elimination easier. I don't want to be here, and I figure that completely ignoring the troublesome woman will get me kicked out pretty quickly. You guys will get the win next week... after I'm kicked off." He grinned as Chouji turned back to look at him, a renewed confidence on the Akimichi's face.

"You never change, Shikamaru-kun," Chouji smiled. Shikamaru returned his slight smile-- he was always too lazy to fully bend the muscles for a wide smile-- and then they heard a sound.

"Hey, losers." Mitarashi Anko had stepped out from the house. Seems like she was one of the neutrals in this. She dangled some keys from a ring in her hand. "Temari says it's time to come back in."

...

Temari had set up a little party area where the girls and she had been drinking a little Sake and dancing to some of her mixed music. She HEARD the guys coming in before she saw them. After some minor rearranging, she decided to allow everyone to continue his or her interactions, step back, and watch a bit. She thought it would be a good idea to sneak certain members of the group away from the others to talk to them one-on-one.

She pulled Ino aside first. They were laughing a while and were a little drunk, so she had ended up giving Ino a slightly lingering kiss. She was rather surprised at how relaxed she was starting to get with everybody so quickly.

Shizune had stepped off to the side and was watching Lee, Chouji, Naruto, and Sakura play a small game of BS; Temari realized she was alone and decided to drag her alone next.

"So, Shizune-san..." Temari asked, a bit nervous... she was fairly certain that Shizune was the only one of the women older than she was.

"Mm...mm-hmm?" Shizune responded quietly.

"..."

"..."

"..."

Temari thought she heard crickets chirping.

"Okay, well, glad we had this talk," the blond muttered, deciding to make an exit and pull a guy aside next.

That next guy was Sasuke. Temari had thought he was kind of cute for a while, and he was being so quiet, so it seemed like a good opportunity to get to know him. She knew from reputation he was at least intelligent so would be a good talk.

She was half-right. Her and Sasuke talked a bit, and then... Sasuke stole a little kiss. This was very new for Temari. Seemed like she was getting an awful lot of kisses in a short time. She changed the subject and asked him how his neck felt. He said it was fine, and tried to cover it, but Temari could still see the bit of red in the shape of his brother's grasp. Feeling a bit awkward, she decided to get another.

The next one she saw alone, having lost at BS, was Chouji.

"So...Chouji-kun...how are you?" she asked with a smile, as they sat in the more quiet area.

"Fine, I guess, this seems like it'll be really competitive and all."

Wow. Actual conversation from one of her "contestants." She smiled again and ushered over one of the more neutral girls who brought a tray of barbeque with her. Temari thought this would be great-- Chouji would like it at least. She was right again. He glanced up thankfully at the girl.

Temari swallowed her thoughts. Chouji connected eyes with the girl, and both blushed madly. She'd never seen love at first sight in action before. Weird.

She decided it would be time for one of the girls, actually intent on finding Tayuya. She knew almost nothing about her and thought she should at least ask. She was flabbergasted when she saw Tayuya trying to sit on a clearly unhappy Shikamaru's lap.

"Come on, Shikamaru-_kun..._" The Pink-Haired Sound Kunoichi was whining.

"Geez, woman. You tried to kill me. I barely know you," Shikamaru protested. He looked like he was trying to escape without hitting Tayuya. "No more Sake for you." Tayuya giggled and hiccupped.

Temari felt rather POed. This was supposed to be about her, dammit! She walked over to the two and smiled-- not the sweet toothy one this time. "ALL RIGHT, Shikamaru-- your turn!" she snapped, dragging him towards the quiet spot.

"...Troublesome woman, you didn't have to grab my wrist so tight," he complained. He looked around a moment, smiled at the sofa and decided to lay down. Temari's jaw dropped.

"And where am I supposed to sit?!" she snapped as Shikamaru had propped up his legs and was getting comfortable.

Shikamaru raised a previously closed eyelid. "Well... I guess I owe you for... SORTA... saving me from that other troublesome woman." He flopped his legs off the side of the sofa, still laying down but giving her room to grouchily sit. "Of course, you're probably just a worse fate."

Temari whacked his knee, only half-angrily. "So you're welcome, then. What are you doing here?"

"Trying to nap."

"No, Lazy Ass, I know that!" she snapped, whacking his knee again. "I mean, why are you involved in this contest. Don't you have somewhere you'd rather be?"

Shikamaru sighed. "Yeah, I sure do. But my MOTHER seems to think I need to get a girlfriend, and this is a good way to meet girls, according to her. Even though I know everybody already." He groggily wrenched himself upright. "So the plan is for you to just eliminate me real quick, okay, and you won't have to deal with me and I'll be scotch-free until my mother's next... IDEA." He stood up. "See ya." He began to walk away. "And by the way... next time, you should try having an actually desirable reward for the winner of one of your dumb games."

Temari managed to throw the empty barbeque plate at Shikamaru's head and make a nice hit before he left the room.

"Troublesome woman."

...

Finally, the week was over. Shikamaru was the only one smiling to himself as they lined up for elimination. He had done nothing but annoy Temari, assuming he acknowledged her at all, for the whole week. He was going to go home!

Temari came out and everyone quieted down. She was wearing a purple halter dress, cut to mid-thigh and hanging loosely draped over her chest. Her hair was down where the bottom two pigtails normally sat, and she had applied a bit of make-up for the occasion...not that Shikamaru noticed... well, not really... okay, so maybe she did look kind of sexy...

"So, here's how it goes," she started when she had everyone's attention. "I have 12 keys here. There are 16 of you, so four of you will go home tonight." Yeah, like me! "When I say your name, please step forward."

She paused, probably for dramatic effect. Whatever. "Ino-chan." Shikamaru's female teammate stepped forward with a grin. Temari smiled and handed her a key. Ino spun around, stuck out a tongue at Sakura, and slipped back into her spot.

"Kiba-kun." Kiba marched forward with a sure of himself smirk. Temari smirked back and handed him a key.

"Matsuri-chan."

"Neji-san."

"Tsuchi-chan."

"Lee-kun."

"Sakura-chan."

"Naruto-kun."

"Would those of you without a key please step forward."

Shikamaru stepped forward, as well as Itachi, Sasuke, Chouji, Tayuya, Shizune, Tenten, and Hinata. The troublesome woman was going to drag this out, and now they didn't know whether calls forward were good or bad... well, it was all good for Shikamaru; he was going to go home!

"Tenten-san," Temari paused as Tenten stepped forward. "I know we don't get along very much, but I think I'd like to know more about you. You still have a shot, if you're interested."

"Okay," Tenten agreed.

"Sasuke-san." He stepped forward. "You're an interesting person, I think." Shikamaru thought he saw a momentary blush creep up Temari's face, and simultaneously felt a tug somewhere in his stomach. Probably just hungry. "You still have a shot. Interested?"

"...Sure," the younger Uchiha said smoothly.

"Hinata-chan." The shy Hyuga stepped forward. "You need to open up. but you're a sweet kid. Here ya go." Temari smiled (probably the gentlest smile Shikamaru had ever seen her use; almost like she was looking at a baby bird) and handed Hinata a key. Hinata bowed politely and went back to her seat.

"As you can see, there's only one key left." Temari flashed the key for all to see. "Four of you will be leaving tonight." She paused. It probably only lasted a moment, but Shikamaru felt like he could sneak in a nap if he had tried. He was curious though whether she would call the key out first, or the losers.

"Shizune-san. You're really nice, but I don't think you and I should try to have a date. We don't have a lot in common to talk about. So... good night. See you." Shizune bowed politely and left. Looked like Temari was doing the losers first.

"Chouji-kun." Ouch! Chouji had tried so hard, too, but-- wait, Chouji was smiling? "You and I spoke earlier. I know about your little crush on a certain someone, so... you can go home." Wait... Chouji had a crush on someone... and he didn't tell Shikamaru... but both Chouji and Temari look happy about this... umm... huh...

Shikamaru sighed. Why was this woman dragging it out? He wanted to leave, already.

"Tayuya-chan. The first night here, all you wanted to do was flirt with Shikamaru." He rolled his eyes; he'd rather not remember that. "This is about ME, not meeting other people. and I like my attention. Please leave."

'Oh, okay. Just me and Itachi,' Shikamaru thought. 'I stand no chance against someone that good-looking.' He prepared to step forward.

"Itachi-san."

"What?" Shikamaru and Itachi said at once.

Temari's face was serious and focused on Itachi. "You seem to want to cause fights every couple minutes. Get the f out of my house."

"Wait, WHAT?" Shikamaru protested. "No, WAIT, you're supposed to send ME home!"

Temari looked grimly right about at his knees. "Well, I could only pick 4, and I wanted those four out. So... you still have a shot..."

"I'm not interested..."

"WELL, TOO BAD!" Temari snapped, looking up at him and forcing a key into his hands. "LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE STUCK!"

Shikamaru, all but threw the key at her. He felt a low almost growl escape his throat, but his Mother taught him well not to raise his voice to a woman unless absolutely necessary. He clenched his fists (and the key) angrily and growled as he began to stomp towards his room.

"TROUB...LE...SOMMMMME...WO...MAAAAANNNNN...!"

...

Author note: Teehee. I feel evil. R&R, please. I don't think I'm getting anyone TOO out of character... Obviously a bit, but come on, it's FAN-fiction. XD


	3. Week Two: Shikamaru's Leadership

**Week 2: Shikamaru's Leadership**

Author Note: Oddly enough, I don't have anything funny or interesting to say for this chapter. So I will merely state that I don't own Naruto or "Shot at Love."

Though I wouldn't mind to. XD

The competition in this one is my idea, but the prizes are more or less from Season One of "Shot at Love." Except tweaked to my liking.

...

Geez... what a troublesome development this was.

Shikamaru exchanged some glances with the others, most of whom remained looking at a grinning Temari.

"Uuh... there's no way that bed is gonna comfortably fit twelve people," Tsuchi whined, gesturing to the king-sized circular bed behind Temari. Sure, it was big bed-- and Shikamaru knew his beds -- but it would still only ended in alot of people (likely the guys) preferring/being forced to sleep on the floor.

"It's not going to," the blond Sand Kunoichi answered calmly. "After tonight's elimination, there will only be eight of you, and you WILL sleep here. Your personal property is being moved and your former rooms are being locked up."

"Um..." Hinata's small unsure voice creeped out of the middle back of their group. "...I think we were all just wondering, um, Temari-san... w-why?"

Temari half shrugged and half rolled her eyes. Shikamaru had a fleeting notion it might have been kind of cute, if she weren't so evil. "This whole situation, with contests and everything, is mainly about impressing me, but I also want to see how all of you get along with each other. So our... um..." she paused a moment, obviously trying to think of the appropriate word. "...our CAPTORS have decided this will just FORCE you all to get along."

"Is part of this contest going to decide where you sleep in the bed, too?" Neji asked in an unreadable monotone. He was always a few thoughts ahead; probably why they called him a genius. Whatever. Shikamaru only felt the effort necessary to think ahead when certain missions or shogi matches were being enacted.

"O-HO...!" Temari laughed, "not a bad question... but no. I still get to sleep in my own personal bed and room."

"Figures," Shikamaru muttered, just loud enough.

"WHAT'S that, Nara?" Temari asked, her eyes narrowed.

Shikamaru rolled his neck in his usual lazy manner and crouched into a comfortable sitting position. "We have to put up with the others' sleeping habits, and the controlling Temari gets to sleep peacefully a few rooms away. You must really enjoy torturing us."

Temari's toothy grin resurfaced, but the eyes didn't match. "Just you, Nara." Shikamaru closed his eyes and shrugged. The sooner elimination, the better. "Anyway, _speaking _of contests, the next one will be now, and it and your prizes will be the last things I see of you before elimination. So suck it up and follow me outside."

_Great._ Just when I was getting comfortable. Shikamaru pulled himself to his feet and begrudgingly followed the others, putting a nice distance between himself and Temari.

He soon wished he hadn't, however, when the others got to see and begin commenting on what was waiting outside before he was able. Frustrated, he strolled around the group.

There didn't seem to be much, but that made it even more suspicious. There were a couple slender poles, somewhere between banner height and building height, spaced about two shops apart. A simple clothesline-thick rope connected the top of one pole to the other. About a quarter the distance between the two poles and attached to the ropes were little pieces of paper. Shikamaru couldn't make them out from the ground. "What's that supposed to be?"

Temari's more pleasant smile had returned in full force. "Written on those little pieces of paper is something very important. The team that gets to theirs first will win. Oh, and there will be a Punishment this time for the losers, so you had better be TRYING." Shikamaru didn't have to look around to know a couple of the guys had emphasized that remark with a glare his direction. "The catch is, no using chakra moves, and no jumping. You have to do this on your own, as a team. Oh, and I'll be watching, so no cheating. The boys will be aiming for the one on the left and the girls for the one on the right. As soon as everyone gets to their positions, we start."

Temari gestured to the poles. Everyone took their position and awaited her signal. Temari blew a whistle-- which she seemed to enjoy too much, probably her control issues-- and both groups seemed to be trying to coordinate climbing on each other's shoulders. Naruto shouted something at Shikamaru... but the Nara had already closed his eyes and put his fingertips to each other.

_No chakra moves... no jumping...the team that gets to theirs __**first**__...six people a team... gotta do this right or the guys'll kill me, this time around... we've got the sturdiness that the girls would lack, but they're faster and more balanced... _

Shikamaru's eyes flashed open. In a short moment he had looked around and seen that everyone seemed to be having a lot of problems trying to stand on each other's shoulders; the girls kept arguing, the boys were starting to, and everyone either kept falling or getting weak-kneed on the bottom of the stack.

"Our form's too flimsy!" Shikamaru shouted to the guys, hopefully not loud enough for the girls to hear. He was answered by a few whats and huhs but more or less had everyone's attention. "Sasuke-kun! Kiba-kun! Stand in a line next to me!" The two, confused but accepting, did so. "We're the best three for a base..." He glanced over at the other three. "Naruto-kun!, Neji-san, climb on our shoulders _like a pyramid,_ not a tower. Then Lee-kun, you climb on top..."

"But Shikamaru-kun," Naruto objected, even as they began to follow his directions anyway. "It'll still be too high..."

"Our base is sturdier now so we won't fall..." Shikamaru grunted as Lee was climbing and had stepped on his head.

"It's no good, I still can't reach..." Lee muttered disappointed as he was stretching to his fullest height. "It's just out of reach, if only I could leap for it."

Suddenly Neji's eyes widened and he looked down at Shikamaru. "Wait a moment, you don't think...?"

Shikamaru couldn't help but let his half-smirk show. "Guess you ARE pretty smart. It's exactly why I put those two next-- their normal jutsu focuses on their arm strength." He flashed a sarcastic grin at the watching Temari, hoping she was listening. It would be nice to win one for the guys, even if the reward sucked. "She said no chakra use and no jumping...

"She never said no throwing."

Naruto and Neji didn't miss their cue, and just in time; the girls had been watching and attempting to copy. Shikamaru knew that at least Sakura might have figured out his plan and implemented it faster if they wasted any time. While Shikamaru didn't like to take things too quickly, he really didn't want to know what the Troublesome Sand Kunoichi meant by "punishment." Lee flew from the other two's throw, twisting his body into a flip that made him reach just a bit higher, and grabbed the paper just as the girls had started yelling at Ino to get to the top of the pyramid.

"Heh," Shikamaru smirked as the others got down and he rolled his neck and crouched to a more comfortable position. "All right, Lee-kun, what's it say?"

Lee unfolded the paper, focusing his wide gaze on it as he read aloud:

"One pass for six...to... Heaven?"

...

They. Actually. WON?

Not only that, but _SHIKAMARU _led the males to the win. She would never admit it, but... Temari was impressed. The girls had started to get it, but only when Shikamaru had started to command the others around. He probably didn't realize he had done it, but he slipped seamlessly in to a leadership position with ease.

"Well, hey, congratulations, boys," she smiled at them. "You get to follow me to _heaven..._ oh, and girls, so sorry, but I'll just have to see you all in _hell." _Temari laughed quietly to herself at everyone's expressions; this really was the funniest of the prizes she had thought up, and she knew no one knew what she was talking about... yet.

She led the boys to a part of the building she had temporarily re-decorated. The whole room was a soft white, the furniture fluffy pillows, a nice Jacuzzi in the middle and cloud-like decorations hanging from the walls and ceilings. She spun gracefully around on her right foot to face the confused boys. With a smirk she pulled off her clothes to reveal a soft-white one piece swimsuit.

"In the other room each of you will find what you get to wear," she commented dreamily as she picked up a feather from one of the glass tables and playfully put it in her hair. "And you WILL wear the WHOLE outfit," she added rather un-angelically with narrowed eyes.

With a couple nervous grumbles and a few intrigued sighs, the boys meandered into the other room. Temari situated herself comfortably on a white beanbag. This should be good.

Oho, and it was! In a few moments all the guys walked out. The majority of the outfit was simple: white swimming trunks. The funny part... was the fake white wings. Naruto and Lee seemed to think the wings were pretty neat, while Neji and Sasuke looked like they were fighting desperately to cling to their confidence. Kiba was actually blushing a bit and avoiding eye-contact; obviously he felt pretty emasculated. Shikamaru was the funniest; his silent but glaring expression with his sloped posture worse than ever before just seethed hatred.

"Come on, guys, it's not so bad," she said between suppressed giggles. She flashed her disarming smile in an attempt to put them more at ease. "At least you're all wearing the same thing, so no one of you looks any worse than the other." Actually, now that her initial giggles had calmed down, she thought they all looked rather good. "There are a couple snacks set up, drinks, too, if you like, the Jacuzzi's nice and hot, and we can just..." she threw a half-joking glance at Shikamaru. "_...laze _about for a bit."

The boys more or less dispersed about the room. Kiba and Lee headed for the food area, while Shikamaru went to lay down on one of the bigger pillows and promptly fall asleep. The other three seemed to be slipping into a conversation near but not in the Jacuzzi.

Temari figured this was another good opportunity to get some one on one time with the others. She walked over to Kiba and Lee first.

"So, what do you guys think?" she asked, leaning into their conversing and snacking innocently.

"Well, the food's good," Kiba grinned through a bite of a cheeseburger. Ew, didn't he know how to chew his food? She looked expectantly at Lee for a response on the food, but he had turned away from the conversation.

"Lee-kun?" she asked. Lee turned around to her, a drink in his hand and a dreamy look on his face, and hiccupped. She blinked in confusion as he put up a somehow lop-sided thumbs-up. Oooh-kay... maybe the alcoholic drinks weren't the best idea for him.

She decided it would be better to go talk to the others. She walked over to Sasuke, Neji, and Naruto. Sasuke and Neji were having a calm but heated debate about something, and Naruto was standing slightly to the side with his calm my-eyes-look-closed-but-I-am-trying-to-look-thoughtful expression. She slid in next to Naruto. "Um... what are they talking about?" she asked innocently.

Naruto paused a short moment though his expression didn't change. "...I have no idea," he eventually muttered, and Temari facepalmed.

"Hey, Brunettes," she interrupted. "Care to fill us Blonds in?"

Neji and Sasuke paused a moment before Sasuke was the first to speak up. "Actually, Neji-san was telling me about a theory of quantum physics, which I didn't think could really be applied to fighting techniques--"

"--Which I had countered with a theory about two hypothetical particles in space and their movement... as I was saying..."

Temari exchanged a glance with Naruto, who looked like he was trying to pretend he understood what they were talking about. She usually felt pretty smart, and was smart enough to know that quantum physics involved nothing but theories of realities that didn't exist or something like that. Yeah, she could probably learn all about it-- but who cared?

She decided to try to change the subject. "Well, just make sure to get yourselves something to eat or drink if you like. Kiba-kun said the food was good, and Lee-kun seems to be enjoying the drinks--"

Neji paused and raised an eyebrow. "Enjoying the--?" Temari followed his eyes to Lee, who was starting to do a sort of happy wiggle-dance to no music. "...Excuse me," Neji said, and swiftly went over to Lee, a slightly concerned expression on his face.

Temari and the two males stared at each other in confusion a moment before Naruto's face suddenly seemed to light into its natural self. "Last one in the Jacuzzi's a rotten egg!" he laughed before running off.

Sasuke rolled his eyes. "Better make sure the Loser doesn't drown himself." He followed Naruto.

Temari sighed. This heaven stuff wasn't terribly fun. She glanced over at Shikamaru, and was slightly surprised to see his eyes open; so he was actually awake! She might as well talk to him, too. She began to walk in his direction.

...

Damn wings were keeping Shikamaru awake. They were comfortable, but felt weird. Plus it was a little too cool in "heaven," so he decided to enjoy the decorations. At least the clouds were pretty neat. He would have to borrow some of these designs for his room later.

"You're awake," he heard from his left. He flicked his eyes up to see Temari standing there with her hand on her hip, leg out in the way she had of standing. He had to admit to himself that the angel look was rather flattering with her light hair, but he knew that the attitude certainly wasn't angelic. He decided to stare up at the ceiling.

"Yeah, what's it to you," he grumbled.

"Move over and lemme sit, so I can talk to you, huh?" she commanded. Shikamaru lifted his legs in the air to indicate she could sit there. She sat down and he let his legs flop back down on top of her. "Ugh," she grunted. "Get your feet off me."

"I was here first. You asked for a spot to sit and that doesn't mean I have to give up my place to lie down."

She crossed her arms in a frustrated manner. "Didn't your Mother teach you to let Ladies have a nice seat?"

"My mother got me into this mess. Besides, you're more like a Demon than a lady." She whacked him in the leg like she had the week before. Good. She'd certainly eliminate him this time.

Before Temari could complain anymore, or Shikamaru could further antagonize her, they heard yelling. Again. Shikamaru looked over at Naruto and Sasuke, who had started fighting each other; probably a kind of training that had gotten out of control. "How troublesome," he muttered. If they weren't more careful, someone would get hurt. Besides, why train when you didn't have to? He saw that Lee and Neji had started trying to hold Sasuke back. Yeah, like that would work. Kiba was starting to antagonize the whole thing, laughing and shouting out comments. Shikamaru pulled himself up and approached the fight as it began to escalate to threats of Chidori and Rasengan.

"Geez, guys, would you cut it out!" he interjected, trying to push between the two. Lee stepped off to the side, looking a little sleepy and confused, and Shikamaru threw a warning glance at Kiba to shut up. It took a little while, but he managed to talk Naruto down. Being that Naruto was probably the instigator in this argument, it was therefore easier for Sasuke to back off. Shikamaru took an exasperated breath . How troublesome; he seemed to be stuck babysitting all the other males in this stupid contest. Well, except Neji, but... wait, where did Neji go?

Shikamaru looked around as the others were settling down and saw something that made it feel like someone had just dropped a heavy stone into his stomach; Neji was kissing Temari.

...

She wasn't sure what had happened; one moment she was watching Shikamaru break up the Uzumaki/Uchicha fight, the next Neji had smoothly slid in beside her. He had laid a hand to her cheek and slowly and slyly begun to kiss her. She had to admit he was an attractive guy, so she kissed back, but it felt... well, a little weird. Like he was focused on the competition aspect too much... He was a good kisser, at least. And this was technically about her finding somebody for a date.

She had felt the others glance at her as the fight had officially ended right before her kiss had, but when she looked up only Shikamaru was still looking at her. This felt even weirder; his mouth was slightly open, lips parted carelessly, and he had a strange stare about him... and for some reason it made her feel like her skin was on fire. Of course, she might have just been blushing.

"...What?" she snapped at him, trying to brush off that feeling as Neji possessively but gently placed a hand over hers.

Shikamaru rolled his neck in his way and his eyes went back to normal, as well as his posture, as his hands went into his pockets. "Whatever... Guess I'll just find a different seat," he shrugged in his monotone voice and went to lay on one of the beanbags.

She shook herself a little bit, getting the feeling completely off of her; it had begun to feel like a smothering slime. "WELL!" she finally sighed loudly to the boys. "You guys stay here; I have to go take the girls off to hell." She got up, left to her room to change, and then walked out to meet the girls.

All of the Kunoichi seemed intimidated about what she had meant by hell, but followed her without much argument. This should be pretty interesting.

She led them into the room she had had outfitted. Everything in the room was either a deep red or black, and the room itself had only hard, modern looking furniture lit by ominous black lights. There was a little bar with some uncomfortable looking stools, quite a few black candles on the walls, and her favorite part, which had no other description than STRIPPER POLES.

She slid off the black robe she had been wearing to reveal a crimson red corset-top and matching short-shorts over black fishnets and stiletto heels. Almost all the other girls stared a moment, and she liked knowing she could make her own gender drool. "Well, ladies, your outfits are in the other rooms, so go get dressed." The Kunoichi listened, but Temari smirked to herself in seeing that they still were staring at her as they left, either from awe, jealousy, or risk of nosebleed. After a little bit they came in their own outfits: black bikinis, complete with red horns and tails.

Ino and Tsuchi seemed to be enjoying themselves. Matsuri seemed to be okay with the clothes; it was just the dancing that had confused her before. Sakura looked quite out of place with her soft-pink hair... but then again, maybe not. Tenten actually filled her bikini rather nicely, a slim but curvy build, and seemed to like playing with the tail. Poor Hinata, whose bikini looked a bit over-filled now that the shy Hyuga had been developing, was almost as red as Temari's corset, and didn't seem to know where best to hold her arms to hide.

"Well, this may be hell," she muttered, "but enjoy yourselves! I've got drinks at the bar, plenty of dancing room... and--" Temari walked sultrily behind the bar and pressed a button and a sexy rave-pop beat began to play. "--Music!"

The girls didn't take long to start dancing or heading to the bar, which Temari promptly excused herself from to scout the situations. Sakura and Ino were discussing something by one of the stripper poles, while Tsuchi danced nearby. Matsuri and Tenten were discussing something else at the bar. Hinata still looked like she was trying to find a boulder to crawl under, so Temari decided to go try to talk to her; she really was a sweet girl, and that sort of appealed to her mothering instincts... or something.

"Hey, Hinata-chan," she greeted.

"H-hello, Temari-san," the Hyuga Princess answered, trying to fold her arms in a way that wouldn't make her just look more provocative, and failing.

"You know, you're really getting quite developed," Temari added. "I'm sorry the outfit is a bit small for you."

"Oh, i-it's okay," Hinata stuttered, still red as before. "It's really nice of you to offer us these outfits. They're really pretty..."

Temari laughed. "Sure, I think so. But maybe they're not exactly your style." Hinata looked up at Temari, and Temari couldn't help but smile and place a light kiss on her forehead.

Hinata blushed brighter, if that were even possible. "Oh, um...Temari-san..." she mumbled. "Th-thank you, but--"

"...'but?'" Temari asked, cocking an eyebrow.

Hinata took a deep breath, trying to strengthen her resolve. "Well, I know this is to be on a date with you, but you see... I sort of thought... _if _I were to win.. that it would be nice... to have that date as friends." She smiled meekly. "Be-because... I know you seem like the kind of girl I would like to be friends with is all."

Temari appreciated the gesture and opened her mouth to comment, but was interrupted.

"Yeah, right..." Tsuchi snapped, having cut into the conversation and placed a hand over and to the right of Hinata's head against the wall. "EVERYONE knows the little Hyuga Princess here likes the nine-tail brat, you don't need to be from Konoha to see that." Hinata looked down at her feet as Tsuchi continued. "I bet she's only here because he signed up." She flicked her dark eyes up at Temari and smiled. "Maybe you should try to see to somebody who actually might be attracted to you, Temari-chan," she said softly.

"Hey, cut it out!" Temari heard Tenten cut in to the group as well. "Maybe YOU should know that the Hyuga are all about respect, and would never do something that selfishly or callously!" Temari was impressed by Tenten's words and decided to watch a bit.

"Tch," Tsuchi muttered. "Like you're much better, following the male Hyuga around like a lost puppy. Or didn't anyone tell you? It's Temari-chan he's after. Looks like it will never be you."

Temari looked at Tenten. Was it true? If it were, that made her feel pretty bad about the kiss earlier. However, Tenten didn't look like the comments had thrown her off her stride, though her fists seemed to be clenched. "Oh, yeah?" Tenten muttered. "Is this something someone who were interested in NEJI-kun would do?"

Suddenly Tenten had turned to Temari and was kissing her. Temari was so surprised, her mouth had been open, so Tenten's tongue flicked smoothly into hers. Temari fell into the kiss a bit stupefied, but, like Neji, Tenten seemed to know what she was doing.

This elimination was going to actually be difficult.

...

Shikamaru decided _not _to be part of the crowd and dress up for elimination. In fact, he packed his things this time, and planned on wearing his favorite mesh top and black pants to elimination. Obviously Temari had a lot of aspects here; he had heard the night before in the big circular bed how Tenten had kissed her, and of course knew about Temari's kiss with Neji... whatever. It didn't matter, he was going to go home and get out of this troublesome place and contest.

Temari was already waiting for them in the elimination room. Shikamaru noticed that only eight keys hung on the post beside her; four would go home.

Temari was wearing a sleeveless black-button up shirt and a knee length, soft-looking skirt, as well as mesh up her right arm and left leg. She had done her hair a little different than usual, the top portion of her hair in one ponytail, while the rest hung loosely around her neck. Shikamaru thought she looked a bit more serious than usual, but... whatever.

"There are only eight keys left," she said directly. "When I call your name, step forward."

Looked like she wasn't going to mess around this time.

"Neji-kun." Of course. "You still have a shot. Are you interested?" Neji nodded, took the key, and lightly kissed Temari on the forehead before returning to his spot. Shikamaru felt that stone again... maybe the food in this place.

"Tenten-chan." Dammit, why did Shikamaru's stomach suddenly feel so heavy? And when did Temari switch to calling Tenten "chan?" "You still have a shot. Well?"

"Sure," Tenten smiled, then took a peck on Temari's lips as well as a key.

"Kiba-kun."

"Ino-chan."

"Sakura-chan."

"Lee-kun."

"Matsuri-chan."

"Would those of you without a key please step forward?" Temari asked. Again, Shikamaru looked at who was with him: Naruto, Sasuke, Hinata, and Tsuchi. Three of them would be leaving when he did. "First things first.  
Naruto-kun, Sasuke-san, step forward." The two agreed. Temari's eyes narrowed dangerously. "I don't like fights to be instigated for no purpose." Naruto opened his mouth to speak, but stifled himself, and Sasuke smirked. Temari's eyes narrowed at him. "DON'T go thinking you're gonna pass on this, either. I already TOLD your brother I wouldn't accept fighting, and yet you continued it." She paused a moment.

"You are both eliminated."

Naruto walked away slightly mopy, likely regretting his instigating that ruined his competition. Served him right. Sasuke looked like he might have caught Naruto's hair on fire as he followed after him... then again, maybe he would do that when out of the house. If the next time Shikamaru saw Naruto, he were bald, Shikamaru would know why.

"Tsuchi-chan," Temari said, wiping the slow-spreading smile that Tsuchi had starting to form from her face. "I don't like when people pick on someone they think is weaker than them for no reason, either. You're eliminated."

Tsuchi stomped out, mumbling under her breath.

Shikamaru glanced over at Hinata, who was shuffling her feet and looking at her toes.

"Shikamaru."

Shikamaru looked up at Temari. Good, he didn't have to have one of those stupid keys. "...You're lazy beyond belief. You're a crybaby. AND you're letting all the brains under your skull go to waste." She paused and looked thoughtful a moment. "But the boys wouldn't have won that contest without you, and probably have been stopping every brewing fight since you got here."

Wait, what was with the compliments?

"Hinata-chan. You're really shy, and that's both really cute and really unnerving. You actually care about the results of this, and were honorable enough to tell me your intentions from the brink." Again, Temari paused. "But I think you have someone else in mind, and I don't know if I want to hurt your chances or your feelings."

What was this?

There was a long pause before Temari spoke again. "So... the person who still has a shot is...

"...Shikamaru."

Shikamaru felt his mouth drop open and stared in silence as Hinata bowed politely and left. Temari looked back at him and held out the key expectedly. "Well, take it already. Or have you fallen asleep standing up?" she said, avoiding eye contact and sneering somewhere around the vicinity of Shikamaru's shoes.

"Dammit, so troublesome. I already packed," Shikamaru finally managed to mutter as he begrudgingly took the key.

...

Author note: I would like to point out that I LIKE Tsuchi as a character, and I'm sorry I had to make her a b--, I needed to pick on one of the girls for this. So she was my victim.

Also, I know squat about quantum physics. :I

Oh, well, R&R. I'll update soon. :)


	4. Week Three: Believe Me

**Week 3: Believe Me**

Author Note: Okay, show of hands, how many of you are reading my author notes? You really should, because if you don't you might miss something. They're not all just legality comments. :-O You wouldn't want to miss something _important_. Like this: later in this chapter, there will be some lyrics in Japanese. If you would like to know their translation, it will be in the author note at the end of the chapter.

Thanks for all the reviews so far. OF COURSE, I'll write more. I'm not that evil. :) Oh, and if any of you like Teen Titans or Ranma 1/2, consider reading my other fanfics. "A Dragon's Tear" is my favorite, though I'm beginning to appreciate this one. But this one still has a while to go.

Why, yes, that was a shameless plug. Teehee.

Anywho: _A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila _belongs to MTV/VH1.

_Naruto_ belongs to Kishimoto-sensei.

Japanese lyrics are copyright to Dir En Grey, from the song "The Final."

Character abuse, however, is all my doing. Bwahaaha!

...

Okay, something wasn't right here. And It wasn't just that Shikamaru had woken up in the middle of a dreamless, pleasant sleep.

Shikamaru felt his eyebrow twitch. Sleeping was something he really didn't like getting interrupted. He kept his eyes closed but was listening to the room. What had woken him up? It usually took a lot, and the air didn't feel right.

"Shhhh..."

"Heeheehee..."

...what was that? Shikamaru rolled onto his side, keeping his eyes closed. Lee was asleep on that side of him, and he could see Neji and then Tenten beyond that, all asleep. He slowly craned his neck to see Matsuri's knee; she looked asleep, too.

"..I think he's still asleep."

"Of course, it's Shikamaru; all he does is sleep."

He had heard that from the other side. Kiba slept on that side of him, then Ino. He now recognized the voices as theirs. What was going ON?

"...Okay, it should be fine, now."

"...so where were we...?"

"Mmmm..."

"...yeah...you like that?"

OH. MY. GOD.

Shikamaru's eyes shot open, and his hands moved to cover his ears. What the HELL? Ino... wouldn't... would she? Suddenly he felt like he didn't really know his teammate very well... Then again, she always did like attention... and wasn't Kiba one of the first to point out what he thought of the Kunoichi when they were dancing?

"...OOoooooooh..."

Oh, no. Shikamaru was NOT going to take this for the rest of the night. If they wanted to do that, fine, but they all had to share a bed, for Pete's sake! At the same time, he didn't feel like he wanted to get involved; maybe if he just stopped it without admitting he knew?

Shikamaru stretched and loudly yawned. "Man, that was a nice nap," he said aloud, knowing perfectly well they would hear him. He felt the bed move slightly and heard a bit of fabric rustling as he sat up. He looked over to that side; good, they were feigning sleep. He looked over all the others; everyone seemed to have missed it, or at least ignored it.

Looked like Shikamaru was just going to have to stay awake and keep watch. How Troublesome.

...

"Today's contest is pretty simple," Temari grinned as she looked at her remaining "suitors." She kind of liked this one. "I am an intelligent woman, and I think I would like whoever goes out with me to be pretty smart, too." She raised an eyebrow. "Not just book smarts, but other things, as well. Now I know a couple of you will have an advantage to this contest." She eyed Neji appreciatively, who managed to contain a smirk, and glanced at Sakura who looked as determined as ever. She knew Shikamaru was a smart guy, too, but he seemed really tired today, even for him. She wasn't sure what that was about, though. "So I'm not just watching to see who wins; I want to see your interactions with each other."

"Will there still be rewards for winning?" Lee asked enthusiastically.

Temari looked thoughtful for a moment, before coming up with an idea. "Sure. Each of you starts with a half hour and will gain five minutes for every win and lose five minutes for every loss. Your end result time--" She grinned. "--is how long you get to spend alone with just me!"

"What's the game?" Sakura asked.

"Well, I thought it should be a strategy game of sorts," she explained, glancing in Shikamaru's direction. She was a little surprised to see him shrug and look away. That's weird, didn't he like strategy games? "...soooo... you're playing Mancala."

It didn't take long to set up. She decided to do things tournament style, which each advancing player playing against the next. Her first draw pitted Lee versus Sakura, Kiba versus Ino, Neji versus Tenten, and Shikamaru versus Matsuri.

The first match didn't take long to reach a conclusion; Temari felt bad for having Matsuri face (and lose to) Shikamaru first. Lee and Sakura both finished next, Sakura beating Lee badly.

Kiba and Ino seemed evenly matched; both were taking moves way too early that cost them a lot of gemstones each time, but it was at such an even rate they were really close. Then it looked like Ino got an idea.

"Gee, it's hot in here, isn't it?" Ino asked innocently as Kiba was staring at the board in one of his rare more thought-out moments.

"Yeah, uh-huh. Make your move already," he growled quietly at her as he was assessing the board.

"Hmm... Okay," Ino smirked. Temari had to stifle a laugh as Ino undid and removed her top, showing down to her deep purple bra. Kiba's eyes (and most of the others' for that matter; it was a big move) were glazing over as Ino slowly leaned toward the board and gracefully moved her pieces. "_Your _turn, Kiba-kun," she smirked as she finished. Kiba tried to pry his eyes from Ino, but absent-mindedly decided to make his move without looking at the board. After that, it was only too easy for Ino to make the move that made her win.

Temari could appreciate that Ino was so aware of her looks and charms; it was one of the things she liked about her. She also thought it was quite amusing that Kiba acted like an unbeatably tough mongrel but turned into a little puppy around women. As she looked around after that particular match, she noted that, except for Shikamaru, all of the others had watched, stalling Neji and Tenten's game. Ino laughed fully and put her top back on slowly, and their game resumed.

Tenten wasn't doing so well, and it was to be expected; Neji _was_ a genius. Temari suspected that the only reason that she had survived so long was that training with Neji all these years had taught her to predict his moves to an extent. But Temari knew from having faced Tenten before; this girl was NOT to be underestimated. As a slight glint crossed Tenten's brown eyes, Temari was fairly certain Neji's fate was about to reverse.

Tenten glanced at the others a short moment and blushed, but shook it off quickly. Then, taking an idea from Ino, she took off her top.

Except that Tenten wasn't wearing a bra, only a bit of binding. Temari was doubly impressed; not only was this a gutsy move for Tenten, but she seemed to have developed some nice curves that were well emphasized by the bindings.

Neji lost.

After a short moment where the girls congratulated a blushing Tenten, Temari heard the guys egging Shikamaru on to win. He rolled his eyes. "Man... why do I always have to fight against girls... this is so troublesome..."

Shikamaru faced Sakura next, and while Sakura attempted the same tactic as the other females, it didn't work. She lost.

"Nice going, Forehead," Ino commented as Sakura lost.

"You lost, TOO, Ino-Pig!" Sakura retorted truthfully. Tenten seemed to be pretty good at this game and had made rather short work of Ino.

The last match was therefore Shikamaru versus Tenten; Temari already dreaded that Shikamaru's time was growing so quickly, and secretly rooted for Tenten.

But Shikamaru won.

This made the grand totals: Neji, Kiba, Lee, and Matsuri at twenty-five minutes; Sakura and Ino at thirty minutes apiece; Tenten at thirty-five minutes; and Shikamaru at a whopping forty-five minutes.

Just. Great.

...

That was too easy. Shikamaru still preferred shogi or go, but Mancala wasn't too tough. It all had to do with counting really, which came naturally to him. Not that he really wanted to spend that kind of time with Temari, but he hated to lose to a girl.

How troublesome. Might as well get this over with; Shikamaru was first.

He walked into the room that Temari had dedicated to this purpose. It was actually a pleasant room, the walls an earthy but light shade of brown, and the only furniture being a deep-hickory colored sofa, which Temari was sitting on when he entered the room.

"Hey," Shikamaru greeted simply as he sat down next to her. She was sitting like she had before, ages ago; her legs crossed primly and disguising her annoyance under a calm manner.

"Hey," she answered without looking his direction. This was going to be so troublesome. As he sat there staring at the wall in the uncomfortable silence, he realized it wasn't really silent at all. He glanced, bored, over at Temari. She shrugged. "I'm playing some music. That's not a problem, right?"

Shikamaru shrugged in response. "No, I guess not. It's not that bad. Sounds familiar."

"It's just an instrumental."

"Whatever." He decided to listen to the music a little closer. "Yeah, I think I know this one," he remarked off-handedly, humming to himself as he put his arms behind his head and closed his eyes. "Mmmm... Te no... naka ni wa... ai subeki... hito sae mo...Hanabana...shiku... chitte..." Shikamaru started to feel himself fall asleep. Hmmm, maybe he'd get a decent nap out of this, at least.

"I just thought it was instrumental only," Temari commented, interrupting his near sleep. Troublesome. "It sounds pretty, though."

Shikamaru opened the eye closer to her and looked at her in disbelief before closing it again. "Tch. The song's about suicide."

"Really?" she questioned. "It sounded so pretty though..."

Shikamaru laughed lightly to himself. "Yeah, well, the instrumental cuts the screaming parts. It's kind of metal-ish."

"Oh." It wasn't pleasantly quiet for a moment before Temari giggled lightly to herself.

"What now, troublesome woman?" He answered, irritated. Was she going to force him to stay awake for the whole 45 minutes?

"Just that it makes sense."

"..._What _makes sense?" Shikamaru answered as he opened his eyes. Geez, this had to at least have been 15 minutes, right? He glanced at a clock. Not even two minutes!

"That you would know lyrics to a song about suicide. _Crybaby," _she grinned mercilessly.

"Tch! Whatever," Shikamaru muttered, closing his eyes and leaning back into the sofa. Temari giggled again. "Are you going to let me take a nap or what?"

"Hmmph. You really are lazy, you know that."

"Yup."

It was quiet again, and Shikamaru was starting to feel the pleasant sinking feeling that signified falling asleep.

"So why did you win?"

Dammit. Shikamaru opened his eyes and leaned forward to rest his elbows on his knees and looked back at Temari in exasperation. Guess that answered his last question. "What are you talking about?"

"I know you don't want to win this," she answered, avoiding looking at him, and obviously missing the tone of his voice. "...So why didn't you just let them win? You never really strike me as competitive."

The lazy ninja sighed. "I really don't like losing strategy games. If there's not really any work involved, then there's no reason why I can't win. Besides, didn't you noticed that I only played against girls?"

"What's that got to do with anything?" Temari asked, raising an eyebrow dangerously.

"Heh. Not that girls aren't smart or anything, but I don't like _losing _to _girls_." He shrugged again. "I guess I'm just a little old-fashioned with girls, like the guy is supposed to protect the girl but be more aggressive, without being overbearing." He looked at Temari, who was staring at him a bit wide-eyed. "Sorry, I'm not sure how to explain it."

"No, it's not that," Temari finally answered. "It's just that... well, it sort of makes you sound... like a bit of gentleman."

"Heh," Shikamaru laughed. "I have to be, in order to get my dad out of trouble with my mom, which happens alot. So I guess even though I don't really know a lot about girls, my mom sort of taught me at least how to treat them without the scary ones trying to kill you."

Temari flashed her wide smile at him; Shikamaru always thought she kind of looked like a different person when she did that: softer. "I guess that makes sense."

There was a longer period of silence again, and Shikamaru glanced up at the clock. Man, was it moving slow. Only ten minutes had passed. He was moderately convinced that Temari wouldn't let him sleep, so rather than be bored out of his mind, decided to change the subject. "So, how's the competition going for you, then?"

Temari shrugged. "Okay, I guess. It's a little weird, you know. When I got into this, I thought it was just incredibly dumb, but now... I might actually want to take the winner on actual date, instead just a joking going out sort of thing." Shikamaru watched her cheeks turn red for half an instant but quickly fade back. He determined not to mention it. "I mean, not that I need to tell you all this."

"It's cool," he muttered. "I'm not going to tell anyone or anything, and I'm sure you want to let some of it out at least." He stared back at the clock. Too damn slow.

"That's another thing," she sighed. "I'm not used to really letting any of my emotions get the better of me, and this competition is tugging them out."

"Heh..." Stupid clock. "...So who's winning?" Temari looked back at him. "...I won't repeat any of this."

"Well..." she started. "I'm not really sure. Everybody seems to have their good points..."

"Like what?"

"...Hmm... well, Matsuri-chan's from Suna, like me, for one, so she has the familiarity advantage. Sakura-chan's always been really sweet, and I never knew I could actually get along with Tenten-chan so well..." Temari pulled her knees into her chest and wrapped her arms around them. "...Lee-kun's actually quite entertaining, and Neji-san's really smooth in his ways..."

"What about Ino-chan and Kiba-kun?" Shikamaru asked, staring at the ceiling now.

Temari let out a slight sigh. "Ino-chan was the first to kiss me here, and she's just so aware of herself... it's... sexy... and Kiba-kun acts so tough, which gives him the attractive bad boy look, when he's really just a little puppy at heart... I just don't know who I'm supposed to eliminate next." She paused. "I mean, besides you... the next elimination, I'm only supposed to eliminate two."

Shikamaru clenched his jaw a bit. Temari seemed to actually like a lot of the competitors... and it wasn't fair. Here he was, making fun of it for her, when she was actually starting to put her feelings out there. "Uum... Temari... there's something you should know..."

"Yes? What is it, Shikamaru?" she asked, looking back to him. Her eyes looked soft again, which must have happened when she was reminiscing about the others. He felt like both saying and not saying what he wanted to might cut off his air.

"...It's about Ino-chan and Kiba-kun... See, I think... They're involved."

"..."

"...sorry?"

Temari let out a laugh. "Wow, it's not like you to try to be funny, Shikamaru."

What? "No! I'm serious!" The woman was still laughing. "Look, Temari, listen to me! You know we all have to share that damn bed, and... I _heard _them..." Temari's laughing suddenly slowed. "...They were... well, I don't want to repeat what it sounded like... but they're definitely involved."

Temari turned to stare at him again, her expression unreadable, as well as her tone of voice when she spoke. "Why would you say that?"

Shikamaru blanched. "...Because it's true. And I thought you should know, I mean, if you are getting close to them and all that."

"I can't believe you, Shikamaru," she said slowly. "...I don't know what you're thinking, but I guess I shouldn't have told you what I was."

"You--What?!" he asked upset, standing up. "I wouldn't lie about something like this, Temari!"

"Get out of here, Shikamaru, your time's up," she said, firmly closing her eyes. After moving so slowly, all of a sudden the time had flown by.

"TEMARI--"

"OUT!"

...

Temari was fired up for this elimination, and her clothes reflected that. She had resurrected the "hell" corset, but wore it over a black dress shirt that laced up the front near her collar. She was sporting a pair of red leather pants that laced on the sides all the way up to her hip, and she was surprised she could walk with the height on the black heels she wore.

She still didn't know Shikamaru's motives for the story he had told, but it just made no sense! Ino had always prided herself on her neatness, and Temari knew from conversations with her that she thought Kiba was _unsanitary. _And Kiba always taunted the girl as a snob; they were far from compatible!

"All right. It's now been three weeks," she announced when everyone had entered the room. "When I call your name, step forward to get your key."

"Kiba-kun," she muttered right away. She glared at Shikamaru, who gritted his teeth and looked away. Good, she was _glad _it irritated him. "You still have a shot. Are you interested?"

"Sure," Kiba grinned. Adding insult to injury, she grabbed Kiba's wrist as he took his key and planted a slowly seductive kiss on his lips, glaring at Shikamaru out of the corner of her eye. His gritted teeth tightened and he crossed his arms, changing the direction he was looking again. Good.

"Ino-chan," she added. "You still have a shot here, interested?"

"Definitely," Ino smiled at her. Temari handed the key to her and planted another kiss. She smiled inwardly when she saw Shikamaru clench his eyes shut. Aw, was the lazy ninja gonna _cry?_

"Neji-san."

"Tenten-chan."

"Matsuri-chan."

She gave them all keys in turn.

"Would the final three of you step forward?" she asked. Shikamaru, Lee, and Sakura all stepped forward. Shikamaru still had his eyes clenched shut, and she was certain he might cry soon. In fact, she hoped he did. "Lee-kun. You're really nice and all, but I think you're a little too much for me. Your shot has ended." Lee pouted, but bowed respectively and walked away.

"Sakura-chan," she started, and forced a smile; she was still upset, so frowning was all she felt like doing. "You've always been really sweet to me." She turned to Shikamaru, who opened his eyes as she looked at him. They were watering, and suddenly she didn't feel as mad. More like she had just had the wind knocked out of her. Though his eyes were watery, she had never seen him look so pleading. It had to be some kind of trick. "The person who still has a shot is..."

That's when she did something she normally didn't do at elimination: she looked at the others who were watching.

And she caught Ino pulling her hand out of Kiba's.

She looked frantically at the others.

"...Shikamaru...?" she questioned as she turned to him. She heard a couple gasps, and Sakura walking away, but her eyes were fixed. "You were... telling the truth...?" she managed to breathe out just loud enough that only he could hear. Shikamaru's eyes caught hers again, and he nodded.

A tear managed out of his eyes, and he pulled his arm up quickly in attempt to hide it. "...You... believe me...?" he mouthed at her. She didn't know why she felt like hitting him and hugging him at the same time, but nodded back. After a short moment she turned to the others.

Sakura had already left and everyone was beginning to move about, being that elimination was technically over. She walked over to Kiba and Ino, and grabbed both of their arms. They both let out a short sound of surprise as she pulled them away from everyone else.

"What's going on, here?" she demanded. The two stared at her, which only pissed her off more. She had just _kissed _both of them, and they didn't even feel like telling her about anything. "I know elimination is over, but I want you both to leave!"

"Wh-what?!"

"Temari-chan--"

"Look, I know you two are involved!" she snapped back. That shut them up. "Just give me back my keys and get the f-- out of my house!"

...

Author Note: Whoa... that was probably my favorite chapter so far. And I finally got to use the line I wanted to, which in case you didn't know, was "give me back my keys and get the F-- out of my house" which Tila Tequila says in season two. I agree with the commentator from "A Shot at Love: The Hangover:" I want that as a ring tone.

As promised, here is a translation of the lyrics from Dir en Grey's _The Final, _which I used as the song Shikamaru sang.

"Even loved ones scatter like petals from flowers in my hand...:"

Well, roughly anyway.

Don't worry, I promise, I'll update soon.


	5. Week 4: The Only Medicine for the Heart

**Week Four: The Only Medicine for the Heart**

Author's note: All right! Now, my ShikaTema fans, I present you with the next chapter! I am happy to say that I am starting to dream bits of this Fanfic now; this is a GOOD thing, as it means I am more likely to type without having to pause for two hours at a time, when I had only been typing ten minutes!

...It's just the way I am with stories. I get this great opening going, plotting out the whole story in my head, and then I get stuck and dragged down trying to transition from part A to part B.

This story is also exceptionally tricky for me to write. You see, I am used to writing from two points of view: either first person (one person telling the story as if it were them) or omniscient 3rd person(all-knowing author can read everybody's minds and actions). This story is a 3rd person point of view, but it's not omniscient; each section deals primarily through one character's eyes.

And let me tell you something: It is easy to get stuck when mentally transitioning between Shikamaru and Temari.

Well, here's the legalities: I don't own these characters, or the reality show rules I stuck them in. I can only lay claim to messing with their unsuspecting lives. :)

Warning: This chapter will contain Gaara/Matsuri. So if you can't stand that pairing, piss off.

Of course, I never gave that warning for Kiba/Ino, but too late now, huh?

...

"OW! OW! OW! Hey, HEY, ONEE-CHAN! I said I was SORRY!" Kankurou yelped as Temari continuously whacked him on the head. "Why aren't you hitting Gaara? It was his idea, too!"

"Because something tells me that this wasn't the type of thing GAARA would have come up with originally!" Temari snapped back, landing one final satisfying whack to the back of her brunette brother's head.

"Do you feel better, now?" the red-haired Kazekage asked her, raising an eyebrow.

Temari looked questioningly at Kankurou again, catching her breath as the puppet master braced himself for impact. "..Yes, as a matter of fact, I do," she finally sighed, much to Kankurou's relief. "So what are you guys doing here? Checking up on me?"

"Sorta," Kankurou answered, rubbing the back of his head. Temari smiled to herself; he'd have a nice knot there in a little bit. "See, we're actually going to be part of your next competition."

Temari's eyebrow flicked up this time, and Gaara sighed, deciding to fill in the blanks left by Kankurou's explanation. "Hokage-same as set us up _as _the next task. Each of your remaining competitors gets to handle questioning by us, and then we give you our opinions."

"Yeah, so it's kind of like we get to tell you who's best for the family!" Kankurou lit up. "Who you got left still, anyway?"

"Well, Matsuri-chan's still here," she responded coolly, "and Tenten-chan and Hyuga Neji." She paused. She was still a bit shaken by the last results; she hadn't intended to eliminate Sakura, and she knew that Shikamaru had wanted to go home even though he had told her the truth. "...and Nara Shikamaru."

"_He's _still here?" Kankurou blurted out as Gaara's eyebrows raised again.

Temari shuffled her feet a bit and hid the momentary blush that she had felt creeping up her neck. "He's... not so bad..." She cleared her mind and looked back up at her siblings. "But he has been begging to go home all month, so it won't matter for this competition; I'm going to eliminate the lazy crybaby this week."

There was a momentary silence as she felt her brothers' eyes on her. Kankurou looked as though he was trying to figure out what she meant, and Gaara was unreadable yet again, something about him that always irked her.

Kankurou finally seemed to step out of his confusion. "Well, Hokage-sama asked us to, so we have to anyway. And I guess our opinions can always be held for you to think about, as well." Gaara nodded his agreement.

"Um...all right..." she answered. "There's just something that's been bothering me." She brushed a stray hair out of her face as she looked at the two. "Why'd you two want me to 'fall in love,' anyway?"

There was another pause. "Don't look at me," Kankurou finally spoke. "I just wanted you to settle down and get out of our hair a bit."

Temari was taken aback; she had always figured that Kankurou had said "fall in love" and Gaara "settle down." Now that she thought about it, she realized that the blond Hokage had never really specified who had said what. She looked askance at Gaara, who lightly closed his crystal-blue eyes.

"...I thought it would be good for you," was all the Kazekage said.

...

Shikamaru was staring at the ceiling above the round bed, except at an angle. He had to, as he was lying with his head hanging off the side. The side of the bed actually felt good on the back of his neck. It was just after lunch, and he had missed it, of course. He had slept in.

Sleeping in the giant bed wasn't so bad anymore. With just four people now, they didn't have to really worry about space issues, and he was _very _thankful that a certain unique pair had recently left. He was allowed to sleep again without worrying about things he hadn't even wanted to know in the first place.

His stomach was starting to growl, and he knew he would have to get up soon to raid the refrigerator before the next stupid contest, or he might never get anything to eat. How troublesome that he couldn't just float food to his bed or something.

His eyes flicked over to his things, packed in the corner. Well, they were mostly packed. After the second week, he had found it too troublesome to unpack and had been just living out of the bags like supremely disorganized closet space.

"HAH!"

_Thud. Ka-thud-CHINK. _

The sounds in the room forced him to look up at one of his roommates, Matsuri. She was practicing with her weapons on a training dummy they had brought into the room. She had landed a kunai on the dummy's chest and one that had landed blunt-end first, and so hadn't really stuck but fallen to the floor.

"Not bad. Try holding your wrist at a slightly lower angle," he muttered. Guess his time teaching classes at the Academy was starting to get to him.

Matsuri turned to him and smiled. "Thanks," she answered. Shikamaru didn't mind her company; she was usually pretty calm, though her temper could sometimes flare. He assumed that was a trait she had from her Sensei. "Actually, I'm usually not too bad with Kunai in general now, but I'm trying to do it faster." She demonstrated by flinging another Kunai at the dummy's head, which had no problem sticking. Her gaze focused on the dummy again. "What do you think the next challenge is going to be?" _Ka-thud-CHINK._

Shikamaru shrugged, rolling onto his belly and folding his arms under his chin. Geez, his stomach was starting to growl. "Don't know." _Ka-thud-CHINK. _

Matsuri walked over to the dummy and pulled out her Kunai, collecting them to throw again. "Huh. I thought you might."

"What do you mean?" Shikamaru yawned, closing his eyes. Troublesome food; maybe he could afford to skip one more meal in exchange for a nap.

"Uh... I don't know really. I just figured you seemed..." _Thud. _"...Dang it... well, not exactly closer to Temari-san, per say..." _Ka-thud-CHINK-ka-CHINK! _"Just... smarter about her, I guess."

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow, though his eyes remained close. "If you say so. I always thought you were closer to her anyway; I mean, her brother is your Sensei and all."

Matsuri sighed, almost sadly. Shikamaru peered his eyelids half open to look at her. "Sorry, did I say something wrong?"

"Not exactly..." Matsuri sighed again.

Shikamaru felt a slight smirk fill his face. "Or did I just mention someone else you knew more about, actually?"

"Uuh...! Wha..!?"

The lazy Leaf Shinobi let out a slight laugh. "...So what are you doing here, when you could be off training with Gaara-san?"

Shikamaru decided not to say anything about the slight blush that had found its way to the young Sand Kunoichi's cheeks. "Temari-san is supposed to go on a date with the winner of this competition, and I know she would rather not let anyone get too close. So I figure if I took the winning spot, then she'd be more comfortable, since she and I are both from Suna and all, anyway."

With a movement that made it sound a lot more difficult than it really was to do, Shikamaru finally pulled himself out of the bed, the growl in his stomach having finally motivated him. "Whatever," he sighed, letting his hands fall into his pockets as he usually did. He started to leave the room to head for the kitchen. "Just don't let the troublesome woman take your eyes off your Gaara-_sama_," he laughed as he left.

...

Temari realized she had missed her lunch hour talking to her brothers. She supposed announcing the last contest could have waited a while, especially considering her elimination was going to be easier tonight anyway.

She smiled to herself as she neared the kitchen; something smelled good. Maybe whoever was cooking would have made enough to share with her; she wasn't really a good cook and had originally planned to just nab some leftovers.

When she crossed around the corner in to the kitchen, she felt her feet pause involuntarily. Her eyes first focused on a bare male back facing towards her, a toned back leading down to black pants over small hips. She felt herself lick her lips slightly at the sexy image as her eyes trailed down the legs and then back up the lean back, to the...

"OH!" she blinked back in surprise as Shikamaru turned around to face her, his face looking slightly warm in the heat of the skillet in his hand. "...It's you." What was she just thinking? That was bizarre...

"Hmmph," he greeted, then, having acknowledged who was there, turned back to his cooking, prodding at the pan with a spatula. "Yeah."

"You're cooking," she muttered, pulling herself to sit on the counter behind him. She had to get to talking about something and get that... weird... image out of her mind.

"Yeah, obviously," he responded coolly. Temari could still smell whatever he was cooking and the sound of it sizzling reminded her of the emptiness of her stomach. Suddenly Shikamaru looked over his shoulder at her, and she blushed, realizing he had probably heard her stomach growl, too. "You want some?"

"Maybe," she sighed. He turned back to his cooking. "What is it?"

"Yakitori," Shikamaru answered.

"It smells good," she commented, her mouth watering.

"Yeah, well, normally I make extra because I'm used to Chouji-kun showing up," he muttered as he turned around. His eyes narrowed as he leaned forward. Temari felt a lump catch in her throat as she could feel the warmth of his skin inches from hers. He leaned off to her side. "Careful, or you'll get burned," he said smoothly, holding the skillet away from her as he grabbed a couple plates from the cabinet behind her. Temari felt the lump shrink and slide down her throat as he pulled away and pushed some of the Yakitori onto either plate. He turned around, handed her one of the plates, and walked to the other side of the counter, starting to eat.

Temari looked down at her Yakitori and picked one up. It looked okay, the chicken evenly caramelized, and she knew it _smelled _good. Tentatively, she nibbled a little off the edge.

"Wow, Shikamaru, this is really good!" she said honestly, smiling as she began to eat. This was way better than anything she could have made.

"You're welcome," Shikamaru sighed between bites.

It was only a matter of time before Temari was done and using a napkin to wipe off her face. "Oh, I thought you should know," she sighed. Shikamaru glanced up towards her, but was still eating his Yakitori. Geez, he even _ate _slowly. "I'm going to let you go home tonight." She paused as Shikamaru looked back at her. What was going through his mind? She couldn't read him. "...So you can relax about the contest. It's not about any teams this time anyway."

Shikamaru looked back at his plate. "So what's the contest anyway?"

"Each of you is going to have some questions from my brothers. They're here tonight, and they're going to review everyone for me." There was a moment of awkward silence. Temari pushed herself to her feet. "So it won't really matter what you say. But I think for the others' sake, you better at least pretend to go talk to them. They already know that you'll be going home."

Shikamaru got up, walking over to Temari and placing his plate next to her. "If you're still hungry, you can have the rest of mine," he muttered. "Thanks. I've been wanting to go home for a while."

"Y-you're welcome..." Temari sighed. "I thought it was the least I could do, being as you helped me out with--"

Shikamaru raised a hand to interrupt her. "Don't even mention it." He smiled lightly, let out a small laugh, and looked at the ground, leaning his back against the counter. "_Really." _Temari laughed lightly, smiling her toothy grin. "So what _are _you planning with the other three?" He looked over at the skillet sizzling lightly in the sink. "Think you might like one of them?"

Temari blushed and lightly hit the Leaf Ninja on the shoulder. "Shut up, it's not like that. I'm just doing this to make friends."

"Tch."

"Shut up," she said again. "I don't know. It would be a good opportunity for me to get a boyfriend or girlfriend, at least. I don't have to go on being single forever."

"Of course, this next contest should prove quite troublesome to that. Especially if one of the contestants falls for one of the questioners."

Temari raised an eyebrow. "What do you mean?"

"Tch," Shikamaru grunted as he began to leave the kitchen. "Never mind. It's too troublesome to get involved."

...

Shikamaru looked at the clock on the wall. Must be another slow one, because this was taking an _eternity_.

The others had already had their questionings, first Neji, then Tenten, Matsuri, and now it was his turn, and he had nothing to really say. He just had to stay in the room for an adequate amount of time.

"So, uh, what you two want to ask me?" he asked sarcastically, leaning back in his chair and putting his arms behind his head.

"I guess there's not much we can ask," Kankurou muttered, resting his chin on his arm. "Being that Temari wants you gone anyway."

"I have a few questions," Gaara asked. Shikamaru turned to look at the red-haired Kazekage, realizing for the first time since entering the room that Gaara looked a bit more colored in the face than usual. "First of all, how did you manage to stay on so long?"

Shikamaru shrugged. "Well, first, I guess because there were others she wanted to get rid of first. Second, because Sasuke, Naruto, and Tsuchi all caused issues, and Hinata had some reason to leave. Then, well... the last time was an accident, I'm sure... I don't really know what happened there." He decided to leave out the part about Ino and Kiba.

"Fair enough," Gaara answered. "Secondly, do you think Temari may actually develop feelings for any of these... participants?"

That one set Shikamaru back a bit; not because of the question, but the fact that Gaara asked it. "...Well, I think she might be. She's putting a lot of thought into it at least."

"Hmm..." Gaara responded. And then there was quiet for a while.

Shikamaru had a notion, but hadn't yet decided how best to approach it. He didn't want to get involved, but... since there was nothing else to do... "Can I ask _you _a few questions?"

Kankurou looked at Gaara in interest, who nodded tentatively.

"All right, first off," he started. Hmm.. how best to do this... "Why did you two do this to Temari? Why not try to get a couple girls yourself?"

Kankurou's jaw dropped. "...Damn it... why DIDN'T I think of that? A bunch of girls _competing _for me?" The puppet master fell back in his chair. "Gaara, we have to do something like this for me, later."

Shikamaru looked askance at the Kazekage, who had yet to answer and only stared at him. He knew better than to push his buttons, but was curious. "Well?"

Gaara closed his eyes. "No one would be interested in me," he said simply, without a hint of sadness seeping through the words. "I'm learning to have power through protecting someone... through having friends. But I am still..." He paused, opening his eyes. The stare was unnerving, but not threatening, and Shikamaru saw Kankurou twitch involuntarily to _almost _place a hand on Gaara's shoulder. "To put it simply, I'm incurable."

"Whatever," Shikamaru yawned, careful to sound indifferent rather than rude; Gaara still held a bit of fear over him. "Next question: What if one of the girls here were to end up dating Temari when one of you..." He decided to reword his sentence when he noticed Gaara's stare. "..._Hypothetically..._ liked the girl Temari dated? Wouldn't that kind of lead you two to put yourselves in a box?"

"That shouldn't really be an issue," Kankurou started. "I mean, the only girls left are Tenten and--"

"...Matsuri," Gaara added in. Kankurou stared at him, and he stared at Shikamaru, who shrugged.

"Maybe you're not incurable," Shikamaru muttered, standing up. "Maybe the medicine just wasn't invented yet." Shikamaru caught Gaara's eyes widen before he left the room.

...

Temari was ready for elimination this time; it would be a lot easier, partly because she knew who to eliminate, and partly because her brothers would be there. While they may not be the closest family in the world, Temari was... well, _used _to them. That would make it more comfortable.

Her more comfortable mood set her clothing choices for elimination. She wore a light lavender top that hung loosely off her shoulders and bared the majority of her back, and a flowing black skirt, as well as her characteristic mesh beneath. She wore her hair in her usual four pig-tails.

She walked in front of her two brothers, who sat in two chairs facing the remaining participants. She looked over at Shikamaru, who was wearing his favorite casual clothes and had a bag nearby. He smiled at her. At least this would be easy.

She spread her smile to everyone else. " I only get to eliminate one person tonight. So when I say your name, please step forward and accept your key."

"Neji-san, you still have a shot. Are you interested?"

"Yes," Neji said with a light smile, taking his key back to his spot.

"Tenten-chan, you still have a shot."

"I'm still interested," Tenten grinned, taking her key happily back to her seat.

"Matsuri-chan, you still--"

"Wait." Matsuri spoke up. Temari paused. What was going on? There was an awkward silence. "Um... I think... I want to pass," the young Sand Kunoichi finally spoke quietly.

Temari's jaw dropped. "Wh-what? Why?" she asked, confused.

Matsuri blushed. "Um, well..." she started, fidgeting a bit and turning her eyes. Temari flicked her eyes to follow the direction Matsuri was looking, and her eyes landed on Gaara, who sat with an intense stare on his student.

Oh. Of course! Why didn't she think of that? Temari smiled at Matsuri. "If you can find a way to give someone else a shot at love, when they probably need it more than me, then I just hope that the one who gets it pays attention," she finally stated. She turned to Shikamaru, and shrugged, resisting the urge to laugh at his mouth being agape. "Here you go, Shikamaru," she laughed, tossing him a key. He caught it and stared at it in his hand.

"Troublesome woman, you shouldn't say one thing and then do another," he muttered, but Temari thought she caught him smirking.

...

Author note: Yeah, I know, that wasn't a terribly ShikaTema chapter, but it had its moments. Besides, I just got done watching Gaara episodes again... and he's my second favorite character, so I couldn't resist.

BTW, my favorite character is Shikamaru. If you didn't guess.

Get this, I'm a girl, yet I cosplay as my two faves all the time. Go figure.

Oh, well. R&R, please.

PEACE! (-.-)V


	6. Week Five: Gray Skies

**Week Five: Gray Skies**

Author's note: Funny how it's getting harder to decide what I want to title my chapters when it's getting easier to write the actual chapters.

Anywho, I would like to tell you a couple things: first of all, though the end of this Fanfic is looming closer (not this chapter, but soon!), I plan on writing a companion fan fiction to this one. Though I plan to not tell anyone about the details until I write it. Bwahaaha!

Secondly, a glimpse into how I write: I have figured out that music helps me to cut from one character to the next easier. As a result, I have now gone through all my music and type with two play lists for this story, entitled "Shikamaru's mix" and "Temari's Mix," respectively. Maybe I will get the courage and time to type out what I have on each play list for those who are interested...

But probably not... Too Troublesome.

For the legalities: _Naruto _is not mine.

_A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila, _the basis for my plot line, is not mine.

Don't sue me. I'm just a hapless fangirl filling in my life by manipulating other characters to my will.

...

"Come on, Shikamaru-kun, get up."

Shikamaru felt a firm nudge against his shoulder, hugged his pillow close, and rolled over. "Mmmm... No..." he mumbled. "Sleep... good..."

He heard a slight, feminine laugh and hugged his pillow even closer. "Ugh... It's not working... You give it a shot, Neji-kun."

"Troubles-- OOMPH!" Suddenly Shikamaru found himself belly up on the floor, looking up at Neji and Tenten.

"Gee, Neji-kun, that's a little harsh," Tenten commented, but smiled at her teammate. Neji smiled calmly back.

"What do you two want?" Shikamaru mumbled, pulling himself slowly to his feet. He glanced at the clock on the wall and groaned. "SIX-thirty? You two know I'm no good until at least eleven... Besides, it's only the beginning of the week; no contests or anything..."

Neji threw a clean shirt at Shikamaru, who, like normal, had only slept in his pants. "That's what we thought. But Temari-san said we all need to be dressed and ready to go by seven."

"_Seven?" _Shikamaru whined. "Well, then I had at least twenty more minutes of sleep before I had to get up..."

"Temari-chan said to look nice," Tenten responded, as Shikamaru's dark eyes narrowed on the dressy-looking shirt Neji had previously thrown. He suddenly realized they had to be serious; Neji was wearing a crisp looking white kimono, and Tenten a long, light blue mandarin-style dress. They looked like something out of an old Samurai movie, but pulled it off quite nicely.

"What's that troublesome woman up to now?" Shikamaru mumbled, pulling on the white button up shirt, buttoning it up to mid-chest, but being too lazy to bother with getting all the way to the collar.

"Not really sure," Neji responded coolly, as Shikamaru groggily began hunting for a pair of nice shoes through his bags. He finally found a pair of decent Geta he owned and pulled them on. He shrugged at the mirror. So it didn't _exactly _match... Good enough. "We'll see you downstairs then," the Hyuga nodded, as he and Tenten left the room.

As Shikamaru finally dragged himself down the stairs, he couldn't help but let his jaw drop a bit. Temari had apparently coordinated her dress from Tenten, but hers only came to mid-thigh and was a deep crimson etched with ornate, gold dragon embroidery. Her normally messy hair only hung out in a few strands, but was up for the most part in a complicated twirl held by two red chopsticks with little gold beads hanging from their ends.

And she was smiling. That always got him, making his surface feeling like it was smoldering.

"Took you long enough," the Sand Kunoichi laughed. "Then again, I know it's early for you, huh?"

Shikamaru realized he was still staring, and decided to block it with a nod and a deep yawn.

"Anyway," Temari smiled. "The reason I had all of you dress up is because this next week, we'll not be here. We're going to go to a little resort nearby. And each of you will be spending _a whole day __**each **_with me, as well as one evening date." For some reason, Shikamaru felt like someone was gripping at his chest; he attributed it to his sleep being interrupted. "Two of you will be lead by a neutral guide to the place where you'll be staying while I go on the first date." She looked over at Tenten, and held out her arm with a grin. "We're going on our date first, Tenten-chan. You ready?"

Tenten nodded, taking Temari's arm as the two walked out of the room.

Shikamaru and Neji exchanged a puzzled glance before they heard a slight cough nearby. They turned to see a smiling (most likely; they could only see the eyes) Hatake Kakashi leaning against the wall as he folded away a yellow-covered book. "Are you two ready to go?" the gray-haired sensei asked smoothly.

...

Temari had her arms wrapped around Tenten's shoulders as they were dancing to a mid-tempo beat. The day had been really good so far; they'd gone to a festival that was nearby, then had dinner at a romantic restaurant; Temari was feeling really comfortable near her. She also enjoying feeling a little in control; that was probably why she had felt so pulled to at least one of the females.

They were at a little club, not too loud of one, but enough that they had managed a few good songs to dance to. Temari spun Tenten out, who smiled at her and let out a little giggle. Something about the way the were now-- Tenten and she still had their tensions, never having really had a rematch, but they both respected that the other wasn't _all _about fights-- really tended to put her at ease.

Temari had finally figured it out; she'd never really had a female friend before.

"I'm worn out," Tenten laughed. "You're really good at this... do you mind if we sit out for a bit?" the brunette explained apologetically.

Temari nodded. "Actually, I wanted to go sit with you a while, anyway... why don't we go back to the Inn? It is about that time." Tenten nodded her flushed agreement. Temari put out her arm with a grin, and Tenten laughed again and took her arm. Temari really liked her laugh, now that she was hearing it so much.

Back at the Inn, Temari pulled Tenten to sit on her bed. "Whew... what a day, uh?" she questioned off-handedly, pulling her shoes off. Damn heels had been killing her.

"Yeah, it's weird," the weapons expert agreed, "I can train for hours, but today was really a lot to assimilate." She pulled off her own, flat shoes.

As Temari looked back at her, she saw that Tenten was pulling her hair down. The chestnut-brown locks fell from Tenten's twin buns, landing about the nape of her neck in soft curls. Temari caught herself staring.

She put a hand up and touched one of Tenten's curls. Tenten looked back at Temari and blushed slightly. "Sometimes it feels like it gets too tight, you know?" she smiled at the blond.

"Yeah, I know what that's like," Temari responded with a soft smile. "...It's really... beautiful, you know." Now the Sand Kunoichi was blushing. "Mine can't make up its mind, either too dry in Suna or too humid in Konoha."

"Oh, well, here," Tenten responded quickly, going into her bag. She pulled out a small bottle. "This may not be a hundred-percent effective, but it does at least a little good on _any _hair."

Temari held the bottle up to the light; a thin, silvery liquid sloshed in the little bottle. "Thanks... what is it?"

"Oh, it's Neji-kun's," Tenten said, looking away. "He gave me some a while back."

"That figures," Temari shrugged. "The Hyuga does have nice hair." There was a pause, and Temari placed the little bottle on her nightstand. Absentmindedly, she placed a hand on Tenten's cheek, who was still looking away. She was going to turn Tenten's face to her and steal another soft kiss, but Tenten placed her own hand lightly on Temari's wrist.

"Temari-chan..." she started. "I'm glad for what we've gotten to experience here."

Temari smiled, pulling her hand away. Maybe she had misread the moment. "...So am I... I didn't realize I might actually get feelings for any of you..."

"Hmm," Tenten sighed, a slight smile in her voice. "Feelings are strange things. You go so long feeling one way, and get pretty determined that that's the only way you know. " She pulled her gaze to look at the ceiling. "Then something comes along, and you finally realize you're not going to get anywhere, so you try to change. Even though the way you felt to begin with sits under the surface forever."

Temari looked deeply at Tenten. She wasn't entirely sure she understood, but _felt _like she did. It was kind of the way she felt, getting used to liking people in general. She smiled at the Konoha Kunoichi. "Thanks for talking to me like this, Tenten," she said lightly, leaning a bit around Tenten and lightly kissing her on the cheek. "I hope you have a good night."

...

Shikamaru stared at the clock by his bedside. Geez, why couldn't he, Shikamaru, the laziest Shinobi in all of Konoha and proud of it, get to sleep? The damn clock already said it was five thirty in the morning! He figured something must be wrong; there was no way he had stayed up the entire night. And why would he?

His eyes flicked over to the balcony of the Inn; Neji hadn't slept either, staring out for almost three hours now. At least Shikamaru had the decency to lay down, but Neji just seemed uptight.

What was further troublesome was that Shikamaru was bored out of his mind. Neji apparently didn't like to talk much; the previous day (really, was that _yester_day, already?) he had spent either training, studying, or staring. Shikamaru remembered him at least stopping to get something to eat sometime that evening, but he wasn't the most fun of company, so Shikamaru had virtually done nothing all day. That usually wouldn't have bothered him, except that how could he have been that bored and not have slept a wink?

Shikamaru let out an exasperated sigh, pulling himself out of bed groggily. "Hey, Neji-san," he muttered. "They come back yet?" he asked, knowing that was what Neji had probably been looking for.

"They came back about four hours ago. Temari-san has been asleep since then, and Tenten-chan has been attempting to sleep, also," the Hyuga stated simply.

"Wait, that long? How did you--" Shikamaru stopped himself. "Right. Byakugan. So what you been staring at them that long for? Shouldn't you have wanted to get some sleep?"

Shikamaru saw Neji shake his head. "I can do without sleep for quite sometime... I was concerned about Tenten not being able to fall asleep."

"Tch. Makes sense, she's your teammate and all," Shikamaru commented, going through his clothes. Might as well get dressed; his "date" was today. "So...did they... share a bed... or...? I mean, so we can get an idea of what to expect..." He wasn't concerned; surely _this week _he would be going home, especially showing up for the date with such bags under his eyes.

"Yes, they did," Neji responded. "Temari-san... fell asleep in her arms, it seems..."

Shikamaru pulled on a nice pair of pants and began to brush out his hair in the mirror. "Oh... But Tenten-chan was uncomfortable then?... Not that it's my business, but..." He wasn't sure if he wanted to say what had crossed his mind.

Apparently Neji didn't mind cutting the air with it then. "No, they didn't do anything like that."

"Oh," Shikamaru answered quietly, surprised at the rush of relief he felt; probably he was just still tense about that subject since the Kiba/Ino incident. He re-looked over the pants in the mirror, and then pulled them back off, deciding to wear something else; he went back to hunting in his boxers. "Do you think they had a good date, though?" he asked curious to know just what Neji could tell.

Neji shook his head again. "My Byakugan doesn't allow me to _hear _that far, though I would say at least by the body language that it went well..."

"...Body language?" Shikamaru asked, pulling on a deep green Kimono that seemed a lot more comfortable for being so tired.

"Lots of kissing," Neji responded simply. Shikamaru was a bit irritated that he always seemed calm no matter what he was saying. "Temari-san's getting up now."

"Right, she'll probably be here in a bit, then," Shikamaru mumbled, finishing pulling his hair into its characteristic ponytail. He grinned at Neji as the Hyuga finally turned from the balcony. "Well, how do I look?"

Neji raised an eyebrow. "Tired."

Shikamaru laughed. "That bad, huh?" He yawned and stretched. "You don't think Temari would let me call this off for one giant nap, do you?" he joked. Neji smirked a half-smile, and Shikamaru shrugged. "Yeah, I don't think so either."

Shikamaru turned back to his things, finding the nice Geta from before and slipping them on.

"Have you seen the two of them kiss?" Neji asked. Shikamaru turned to him, a bit confused. Neji had crossed his arms and was staring at the ground. "...I mean, besides at elimination."

Shikamaru tried to shake off the strange feeling of something crawling on his shoulders, and turned back to the mirror. "Um, no, I haven't. I heard about it a little from the others though, after the heaven/hell thing. Why do you ask?"

"Hmm..." Neji sighed. "It's just that I _have, _and I wonder if maybe Temari-san likes Tenten-chan's kisses better..." There was an awkward silence.

A whole day in quiet, and _now _the Hyuga wanted to talk. Shikamaru sighed. "What's this about, Neji-san? Feeling insecure?"

"Hmmph, hardly," the Hyuga smiled arrogantly. Shikamaru was feeling a twitch develop in his eyebrow. "...more like curious."

Shikamaru's turn to sound arrogant. "About what?"

He thought he caught a slight blush cross Neji's features as the Hyuga looked off to the direction of the balcony. "...Well, _you _haven't kissed Temari-san, have you? Aren't you curious about that?"

Shikamaru's voice caught in his throat, and he brought his hand nervously behind his head. "Troublesome... why would I think about that? ...but since you brought it up..." Shikamaru couldn't believe he was continuing his sentence. "... what kind of kisser is Temari?"

Neji looked thoughtful a moment. "Hmm... an accurate adjective? ...I suppose... _intriguing._"

"Intriguing, huh?" Shikamaru shrugged. "Well, I'll take your word on that. It's no secret I've been trying to go home for weeks."

Neji was looking out the balcony again. "Temari-san is the Suna Ambassador. Her position places her in high respect, and she is an attractive and strong Kunoichi. A winner of this contest, even if only receiving one date out of it, could gain a great deal of prestige from the event."

Shikamaru sighed. "So that's what it is, then, huh?" He finished tugging at some wrinkles in his Kimono as a knock sounded at the door. "Well, good luck, then. I'm sure Temari wouldn't mind helping you out a bit."

Shikamaru dragged himself to the door, but felt his jaw drop yet again as he opened it. Temari smiled back at him, her hair up in its usual four pigtails. She was wearing a loose, forest-green tank top and a pair of tighter fitting deep black jeans over some comfortable tennis shoes, but something about the casualness of it made Shikamaru feel his heart jump.

"Wow, you're actually up," she blinked, looking his outfit up and down. "And ready, too..." She paused. "Sorry, I thought you'd have worn something more casual..."

Shikamaru pulled the stare off his face and let a small smirk fill it. "I guess you'll just make me feel overdressed, then. I only had this one good outfit left that I hadn't worn, so I thought..." He trailed off with a shrug.

"Right... since you're going home later," she said slowly. "Well, if you're finished, then, we can get going. Oh, but grab an umbrella, it's pretty cloudy out."

Shikamaru nodded, pushing Neji's voice out of his head-- _"Aren't you curious ...?" --_as he grabbed an umbrella by the door and the two headed out.

...

"So what's your plan for today?" Shikamaru asked as they wandered down the street. Temari was looking at the sky; the clouds were looking fairly ominous, and she wasn't sure if she wanted to be out very long as it was getting so hot and humid.

"Well, I thought we'd do something both of us might enjoy," she started, "or at least tolerate. So we're going to catch a bus to a temple nearby. I think it would be fairly interesting since I've never seen it and it's supposed to have a lot of wind element influence, and it'd be calm, so you might... I don't know, sleep or something." She shrugged. "Sorry, guess I didn't plot our date out much, but since it's not really something we want to do anyway..."

Shikamaru swung the Umbrella from its string to hang over his shoulder as he looked at the sky. Temari secretly was impressed with the way he looked in the Kimono, even if it were a bit wrinkled. "Whatever. Guess I might as well enjoy a free trip, right?"

Temari playfully whacked him on the shoulder. "Good for nothing," she mumbled. "Well, this is our stop," she pointed out, as the two sat down on a bus stop bench. Sure enough, a few moments later a bus stopped in front of them. Temari pulled out a small leather pouch, paid the driver for both of them, and the two sat down on a seat near the middle of the bus. Shikamaru sat on the outside seat and stared out the window opposite the aisle, where no one was sitting. Temari decided to mimic him and face the opposite side to watch the scenery flash by.

In a short moment or so, she had to turn around when she heard a soft breathing next to her. That lazy crybaby; he was asleep! Temari had a good mind to rudely wake him, but shrugged to herself when she noted the bags under his eyes. Well, it wouldn't hurt to let him sleep on the bus ride, she thought.

Her thoughts were interrupted when she felt her arm wrenched around behind her and a blade against her throat.

"...Don't even think about moving or screaming," a scratchy voice from the seat behind her whispered. "Your little boyfriend is asleep, but if you make any moves to wake him up, or if his eyes even half open, my friend will stab him through the seat cushion faster than a bolt of lightening." Temari's eyes frantically flicked around; her arm was pulled into a position she couldn't do any hand signs with, and she now realized they had sat in a blind spot of the bus driver's mirror.

It was one of the few times she felt scared. What was this guy going to do? And if she made a noise, would they really...? Her eyes flicked desperately at Shikamaru. Damn lazy ninja! WAKE UP! ...but don't let them know it...

"We know you're the Suna Ambassador," the scratchy voice continued. "And here's what's going to happen. We know that freak you call a Kazekage is your brother, and we also know that he's no longer a Jinchûriki Host. So he's harmless, now." Temari disagreed, but the guy's laughter made her skin crawl as he continued. "We figure that he'd pay handsomely out the nose, or rather, out of Suna's treasury, to get you back in one piece. So here in a bit, you're going to take a nice little nap and come with us; as soon as the last person gets off this bus at this next stop."

Shikamaru stirred slightly in his seat as the guy finished his sentence, and Temari desperately mentally urged him to wake up, do something, just be careful, get them a little more help, do somethin--

She smiled to herself as she saw Shikamaru place his fingertips against each other, his eyes still closed.

"Uh... you know, that won't work," she started, deciding to buy him sometime. Whatever you're thinking, lazy ass, do it quick! "See, even though Gaara's Kazekage, he is still... monitored by the council... and they won't... hesitate to get rid of me..." Her eyes went to Shikamaru's hands, which had started to beat a few very slow hand signs. He was disguising it to look like he was still asleep! "...So you really ought to just..."

In one swift movement, Temari's arms and throat were released, but Shikamaru was grinning at her with his arms holding an imaginary knife to her throat and pushing her back against the seat.

He peered backwards over the seat at the two guys, and Temari leaned a bit upward to see the accomplice in the same position as Shikamaru, except with his blade against his partner's throat and his partner held against the back of his own seat. "I thought Shadow _Possession _would be better with you jerks," Shikamaru said with a slight laugh in his voice, "just in case you were anyone whose face I might have to remember for a later conspiracy or something." He looked back at Temari. "You okay?"

She was still being pressed back into her seat, but knew that it was just to keep one of the guys in place. "Yeah, thanks," she sighed. "I was a bit worried for a moment, there. I thought you were--"

"I was just resting my eyes," he sighed in his deep monotones. "I thought it was suspicious that these two were trying to hide their weapons when we came on the bus, plus they were looking at us out the window before we boarded."

Temari's eyes widened, and she resisted letting her jaw drop. So he _had _been paying attention to detail, and how! Probably he had counted out all of his moves ahead... like the perfect strategist she knew him for.

"I don't recognize them, you?" he asked, snapping her out of her awe.

Temari strained her neck to look at the two. "...No. Must just be a pair of rogues or something."

Shikamaru grinned again, and Temari found she rather liked the way his eyes darkened when he did that. "That's what I thought, too... so chances are we don't need them... would you rather I finish them off, or would you like to show them what that giant fan is capable of?"

"No! No, wait!" the first assaulter objected, the blade still against his throat. "Really--we-- we were bluffing, yeah, we have swords, but we're really not that good at 'em! Please! Don't--Don't hurt us!"

Temari grinned at the two mischievously. "Oh, I don't know, it _has _been a while since I got to take someone down..." she laughed. Out of the blue, Shikamaru had reached over her, his hand that had been holding her back wrapped around her as the other stayed in blade position. She blushed as she felt his rough fingertips graze her side where her tank top had slid up slightly.

Just as quickly, he pulled away, flinging the same arm to the side; Temari realized what he was doing when the perpetrator behind him threw the weapons of the other across to an empty seat. She tried to shake off the burning sensation she had felt rising to the surface of her skin where his skin had touched.

"All right," Shikamaru muttered, the strain on his face to hold his jutsu showing; he never was very good with chakra stamina. She decided to maybe teach him a little if she could later. "I'm going to release you, and you're going to tie your friend here to the seat, and then Temari's going to tie you to yours. If you give me any problems, I won't hesitate to extended my shadow to yours and hold you still for Temari to take her frustrations out on, got it?" Temari knew Shikamaru was bluffing this time, but the other two didn't. Soon the two were both tied up and weaponless, and Shikamaru finally released the Jutsu. After that, they had handed the bus driver a little bit of instructions for the two creeps, and gotten off at their scheduled stop, near a sign that read "Yoake no Temple."

...

"Checkmate," Shikamaru grinned as he moved his last piece.

The elder monk smiled widely. "Oho, not bad!" he laughed. "Care to play again? It was a close match." Temari had been right about there being things to do. Shikamaru had found a nice grassy area in the courtyard of the temple and had watched a few gray clouds float by (she was probably right about the rain coming soon, too) before he had over heard a few other monks playing shogi in the courtyard. He had smiled at Temari, who had waved him to do whatever as she went to look at a few small wares and other items in the shop area of the temple.

The monks were not all bad at shogi, as it had turned out, and this older man in particular had been quite the challenge; on the last match, Shikamaru was worried his winning streak might almost have been broken. "Sure, old man," he smiled as they began to reset the pieces.

As Shikamaru finished up and was deciding his first move, he heard a little giggling from a few girls walking by, a tall woman the center of their group smiling lightly behind a small fan in front of her face. Shikamaru found himself staring at her; she had such elegant curves, with a pale blue kimono wrapped around her. The kimono was embroidered with flowers in a silvery thread; Shikamaru was surprised he was remembering Ino having blabbed something about flowers before and recognized artistic renditions of Daphne and Foxglove. As she walked, Shikamaru was drawn into her movements, slow, deliberate, but graceful, as his eyes traveled to her soft-blond hair that fell lightly onto her shoulders in artistic flicks, and her slanted aquamarine eyes peering over the fan.

She was walking toward him.

"Uuh..." he stuttered as she approached.

"Hey," she said lightly. Wait a minute... She pulled the fan away, and Shikamaru felt his heart jump into his throat. "Well, lazy ass... what do you think?" Temari asked, folding up the smaller fan and putting its string around her wrist. "You're not overdressed anymore; some of the priestesses actually _gave _this to me. Can you believe it?"

Shikamaru cleared his throat as the old priest chuckled lightly. "You... look really good," he finally muttered, much to her satisfaction. She flashed him her toothy smile, and Shikamaru felt a burning growing just below his ribcage.

"I think I'm ready to go, if you are," she smiled. "The girls said I could keep this all, and our bus to pick us up should be showing up soon."

Shikamaru nodded, and then turned back to the priest. "Sorry... maybe some other time."

"Anytime, anytime," the old man laughed. "I can't blame you for being dragged away by such a beautiful woman."

Temari blushed lightly, flipping her smaller fan back open.

"Don't let it fool you," Shikamaru smiled, getting to his feet and brushing off a bit of grass. "She's probably the scariest woman in existence." Temari glared at him and whacked him with her little fan.

The two walked back down to the bus stop, and Shikamaru watched the clouds as he walked. They were getting strewn out thinly, blending with the sky; it was getting hard to tell them apart from the sky at all, which was changing color as the sun was setting.

"Oh... Oooh... not good," Temari muttered, looking through the little bag the priestesses had given her for her other clothes.

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow. "What?"

"I...I can't find my bag..." she muttered, her voice growing frantic as Shikamaru heard the bus approaching. "...with all my money...!" As the bus home pulled to a stop, its door opening expectantly, she looked at Shikamaru. "I... I think I left it on that other bus!"

He rolled his neck to look back at the sky and groaned. "Don't look at me. I was excited about the free trip, remember? I didn't know it would be one-way."

Temari looked pleadingly up at the bus driver, but the look wasn't working; soon the door was closed and the bus drove off.

"DAMN IT!" Temari swore. "This is the worst day ever!"

"You shouldn't say that," Shikamaru mumbled. "I don't like the idea of having to walk home either, but it could always be worse." His gaze was fixed on the gray sky. What a troublesome development...

"I was nearly kidnapped, you were nearly killed, I lost my bag, and we're going to have to WALK home! How else could this possibly get worse?!"

Shikamaru shrugged at her and pointed to the sky. "That."

"What?" Temari asked, looking up. "You and your damn clouds...?"

Shikamaru frowned, looking back up at the sky. "The clouds are gray, not white or black. It's going to rain. .. and soon... I'd say... right...about..." A crack of thunder sounded and the rain began to pour, taking mere moments to soak the two of them to the bone. Temari glared angrily at him, as he looked back down at her. "Told you it could get worse."

"AAAAAAARGH!" Temari screamed in frustration. She started throwing what could only be called a hissy fit, jumping angrily up and down in the quick forming puddles. Shikamaru suddenly found himself laughing enough that he had to hold himself from falling over. "WHAT?! _WHAT?! _This is _FUNNY _to you?!"

Shikamaru calmed himself down a bit. "I'm sorry, it's just... you look like a little kid..." He managed to hold back just enough laughter to calm down. "It's odd seeing you _not_ uptight..."

Temari glared at him, her wet hair plastered to her face. "Where's the damn umbrella?" she asked expectantly. Suddenly, Shikamaru's face lit red. "Oh, no...don't tell me..."

"Uh," he started, putting his arm behind his head nervously. "I think I must have left it on the bus."

"AAAAAAAAARGH!" she yelled again, and Shikamaru let her indulge in whacking him angrily on the shoulder. "STUPID! LAZY! CRYBABY! IDIOT!"

"Feel better, now?" Shikamaru groaned, rubbing the sore spot on his arm. Whacks were one thing; whacks on wet skin were something else.

"Not really," she growled.

Shikamaru reached around her; he could feel the warmth of her face fuming in the rain, even though it was soaked. She froze up, but he carefully pulled her larger fan off its holster. He opened it up, flipping it cautiously over their heads; it was heavier than it looked.

"Come on," he sighed. " I think I saw one of those small shrines down the street a bit on the way up here; we can rest under it until the rain slows a bit."

Sure enough, there was a little shrine nearby. Letting Temari's fan fall more into her weight as she folded it, so they could fit in the phone-booth sized space, he offered a quick bow to the smiling statue that was sharing their space. Temari did the same, and they both turned around to watch the rain for a while.

It was hard to hear under all the rain; it was really coming down. Shikamaru glanced over at Temari, and got a little worried; her lips were turning blue, and she was shivering. He slowly wrapped an arm around her shoulders. "Hey, it's cold all of a sudden, huh?" Temari nodded, avoiding his gaze. "Tch," he sighed. "Here." He started wiping her hair back away from her face, wringing out some of the excess water.

She looked up at Shikamaru, her eyes soft. He smiled to himself; poor woman was still shivering. He undid part of his Kimono top, wrapped it around her, and pulled her into him, hoping that some of his heat would transfer.

"I--I'm not u-used to this," she shivered. "It... doesn't re-really get this c-cold... in Suna..."

Shikamaru shrugged, stroking her hair back from her face. "Guess it's just something you get used to. Sorry I forgot the umbrella."

"N-no..." she muttered. "I'm sorry... I ... l-lost.. my bag..."

She looked back up at him, still wrapped in his arms, and he smiled lightly down to her, suddenly trying to remember when he out grew her. "Trouble...s-some woman..."

She laughed lightly. "N-now... _you're _shivering..." As she looked up at him, her eyes soft and wide, his eyes fell to her lips. They were shaking lightly, but a warm rosy color was returning to them. Shikamaru found his hand traveling comfortingly up and down her back, trying to push some of the water off her. His other hand seemed to move of its own accord, brushing her plastered wet hair back and off her face.

"_...__**you**__ haven't kissed Temari-san, have you?..." _

Shikamaru took in a deep breath, a little confused at those troublesome words floating into his head as he looked into her eyes. She wasn't looking away, and Shikamaru felt a pull in his throat, like he might explode, or maybe melt, and he wasn't sure why. Before he knew it, that feeling was pulling him closer to Temari, and his eyes were softly closing. He could feel her breath meeting his, could feel the warmth of her lips only millimeters from his own.

And he pulled forward.

Her lips were soft and moist, and her arms wrapped lightly around his shoulders as his own softly pulled to her waist. He cautiously slid his tongue to her lips, shyly tasting them. He felt her mouth open invitingly to let the tip of her tongue taste his. Soon their two tongues were dancing together, and Shikamaru felt like he was on fire, though the rain still clung cold to their skin.

He took in a deep breath, smelling the rain, smelling _her, _and tasting her lips as he wrapped his arms around her tighter. Somehow she slid her hands to his bare chest, their smooth touch caressing his tired muscles and urging the fire beneath his skin to burn higher. She tasted so sweet, so much sweeter than he had ever imagined, and he _needed _to taste her. He brought one hand to her cheek, gesturing her face closer to his. Their mouths were fully open now, tongues sliding slowly from one mouth to the other. Shikamaru was certain the world was crashing, the sky was falling, and he was floating in the clouds, courted by this sweet, sweet wind.

Slowly, excruciatingly, the kiss slowed, their mouths moved apart, him lightly nipping and sucking at her bottom lip as they finally separated. He rested his forehead against hers, his deep brown eyes looking into her soft aquamarine.

"...It's... stopped raining," she whispered, and he wondered when her voice had gotten so soft.

"Yeah," he muttered softly back, equally curious about his own voice sounding so far away. But of course it felt far away; he was still on a cloud somewhere.

Temari blushed and pulled away, and Shikamaru felt like his arms had never been so empty. "We... should be getting back... it'll be a long walk..."

"Uh-huh..."

"Intriguing" wasn't _near _good enough of a word.

...

The skies were still gray, and Temari and Shikamaru walked in silence until her fan could dry out. Temari really couldn't think of anything to say after they had kissed, but it still lingered on her mind: the feel of Shikamaru's lips on hers, the way he had held her, and the way his tongue had tasted so _good. _Temari still felt like her insides were burning, and wanted to turn back to that little shrine and linger in that kiss longer. She never knew... never would even have _guessed _that _Shikamaru _could make her think of his lips against hers for so long after they had parted.

She still wasn't sure how they had ended up that way; all she could remember was looking into his eyes and feeling how warm it was in his arms and then...

...bliss.

"Shouldn't your fan be dry by now?" Shikamaru's deep monotone had interrupted her train of thought. She had been walking a bit ahead of him and looked back at him for the first time since the kiss. He looked back at her, his Kimono still soaked and his hands resting in his pockets. Temari wondered at what point his voice had started to sound so sexy. He smiled his half smile at her, the circles under his eyes actually looking cute. "Uh, Temari, you there?"

"Huh? Oh!" She realized she had been staring and so had forgotten to answer. "Yeah, I think so." She flipped her fan open, looking at the bit of rain still clinging to the folds. "It's not so bad; we can probably fly the rest of the way back, if you donate a little chakra to get us off the ground."

"Well, if it means not having to walk," he muttered.

Temari held the fan in front of her and turned her back to him. "Hold onto my waist," she instructed, but quickly regretted it when his touch raised the burning in her She stifled the feeling, and soon the two were airborne.

Shikamaru wrapped his arms around her at the waist as his legs wrapped around her as well. As he leaned against her back, Temari shuddered slightly at the light kiss of his lips on the back of her neck. She felt comforted by his breathing, even as it slowed and deepened...

"You're asleep, aren't you?" she sighed, but his soft breathing was the only response.

As they reached the inn, Temari had managed to watch the clouds finally disperse a bit, clearing the night sky. It was really quite beautiful as the stars were starting to finally show, even though it was so late. She nudged Shikamaru to wake him.

"Uh...huh?" he moaned as she felt him sit up a bit.

"We're back at the inn," she said through a slight yawn as the two landed.

Shikamaru stretched and looked at her apologetically. "Sorry... you're probably exhausted from all that chakra use, and I just slept through the whole ride."

Temari shrugged. "I have high chakra stamina. Besides, you were so tired all day, even for you... did you not get much sleep?" It seemed like a stupid question to be asking Nara Shikamaru, of all people.

"Actually, no, I didn't sleep much," he shrugged, to her surprise. "Do you mind if we get to bed?" Temari blushed lightly at the implication of his words, but nodded.

When they got to her room, she went to the nightstand and began rummaging around. Good, she still had a good deal of funds in another bag, and she didn't seem to lose anything too important. As she turned from her nightstand, she froze. Shikamaru had undone the top of his Kimono, which was now folded over at his waist. He had let his hair down from its damp ponytail and was rubbing it out from being tied up all day. His dark hair hung glossily around his face, and Temari felt her heart leap at her throat again, the fire growing hot.

"I'm gonna take a shower," he said simply, yawning as he headed to the bathroom. Temari blushed. She could see a mental picture of the steaming water running smoothly over his lean muscles, and it made her _ache _to want to be near him again, running her fingertips over his hot skin.

Temari shook her head again; how could she be thinking of _Shikamaru _like that?! Pushing the image to the back (but not out) of her mind, she quickly checked to make sure she could hear the water running. In a few short moments she had changed into some loose-fitting pants and a long-sleeve shirt, as well as dried herself off. Checking to make sure the heat was turned up in the room, she crawled under the blankets, and listened.

She eventually heard the water turn off, and slight movement from the bathroom. Then she felt the blankets pull back, and Shikamaru crawl into the bed.

Lazy ass's hair was still wet.

Somehow she managed to forgive him as she found herself snuggling into his waiting arms. She smiled lightly as his face nuzzled against hers in the warm dark; she could feel the warmth from his shower rising from his skin. He was only wearing a pair of boxers, but even though it was less clothing, it made her feel that much warmer.

"Troublesome woman," he whispered in her ear, and she smirked at his warm breath being so close. Even if he was a lazy crybaby. There was a long pause, and Temari almost thought he had fallen asleep until she heard a deep sigh.

"...Please... I can't watch them kiss you again... eliminate me tomorrow..."

Temari felt her heart cave in.

...

The first thing Shikamaru felt when he woke up was that his arms were empty. Eyes still closed, he reached around the bed almost automatically, looking for Temari--

And found the end of the bed and fell off.

"Troublesome gravity," he mumbled aloud as he forced his eyes to open, too lazy to get up from the floor. He looked around the room; Temari was nowhere to be seen, and Shikamaru was fairly certain it was his fault.

His mind had moved a mile a second during that shower, replaying this whole damn competition, but mostly replaying kissing Temari. Shikamaru had never realized anything like that was missing, but now it ached to not have her close. What hurt worst, though, was when his mind replayed Temari's kisses with Neji and Tenten. Sure, he hadn't actually seen Temari and Tenten kiss himself, but he knew it had happened.

The fact that Neji mentioned that the two Kunoichi had kissed alot before made Shikamaru feel like his chest was just a gaping hole. And Temari's date was with Neji, today, all day... he hadn't been able to deal with the image of Temari sleeping next to Tenten, how could his heart handle knowing that she would sleep next to _Neji, _tonight?

So he had decided to be indifferent. To not get involved any worse than he was. Temari couldn't stand him; that was the simple truth. And he couldn't honestly hope to win this stupid competition, not after all this, so why had he...? It didn't matter, he had thought, except to not have to see them kiss her anymore. The only realistic way to do that was to leave. Plain, simple strategy.

But when Shikamaru had said it that night, after she had pulled herself _back _into his arms, he had doubted it for a second. Maybe he could... he might... but Shikamaru considered himself a smart person, and he had said what had needed to be said. He'd go home soon.

Logically, this should have helped; like figuring out a shogi match might end in a stalemate and leaving it at that before wasting too much effort on a solution. Since he had come to terms with the inevitable, and done something about it, Shikamaru _should_ have felt better.

Shikamaru didn't. He felt worse.

Now the gaping hole in his chest felt like it was going to swallow him whole, a sick taste lingering in his mouth. Sure, he could try to remove that taste, just picturing that kiss again... Troublesome. Have to push it out.

He noticed the clock on the wall said it was almost two thirty in the afternoon; he really had to have been tired to sleep in that long. In one extended period, anyway. Temari was _never _late unless something held her up, and had probably left promptly around seven for her date with Neji. Shikamaru groggily pulled on his now dry Kimono and headed to the room he would stay in that night to pick up some of his money for some very late breakfast at a restaurant somewhere.

When he opened the door to leave, he was a little surprised to see Tenten there with an arm raised ready to knock.

"Oh, hey, Shikamaru-kun," she greeted with a light smile. "I was just coming to see if you were still asleep."

Shikamaru rolled his neck, wincing a little as he heard it pop. "Just woke up, actually," he sighed. "I guess the other two already left?"

Tenten frowned slightly. "Yeah, this morning. They were both pretty dressed up..." The dark-haired Kunoichi quickly pushed a pleasant smile back onto her face. "...So how was _your _date?" Shikamaru stared blankly at her. "Oh, sorry... I forgot, you just want to leave and all."

Shikamaru shrugged. _I have to get that out of my head. _"It was all right. I found a new Shogi partner at a temple." _And I kissed Temari in a shrine in the rain. But I'm trying to FORGET that... _

"Oh, that's neat," Tenten smiled, as the two made their way to the room the three competitors shared. Shikamaru found his little bit of money, and the two made their way to a nearby restaurant. "...We went to a festival, and dancing. She's not a bad dancer." Shikamaru was certain he could agreed with that, but decided against mentioning it.

"What do you think they're doing for their date?" he asked offhandedly as he ordered some Mackerel Tenpura. He'd have to drink water, but he'd have enough.

"I don't know," Tenten replied, ordering Sukiyaki and tea for herself.

"Which of you do you think will win?"

Tenten's eyebrow twitched slightly. "If Neji-kun thinks he's going to win this thing, he's got another thing coming."

Shikamaru stifled a smirk. "You taking this thing personally, huh?" Their drinks arrived, and Shikamaru turned his attention to his water, not realizing he was so thirsty.

"Neji-kun always focuses on what he wants, I know from being his teammate," she explained. "Especially if he thinks that Temari-chan's association with him can lead to a way out of the lesser branch of the Hyuga, he'll stop at nothing to win."

The waitress came back to refill their drinks, and Shikamaru began to spin his straw in his glass. "So you want to beat him because...?"

"To prove that I'm here," she sighed. Shikamaru looked questioningly at her, awaiting more explanation. "_No one _beats Neji-kun. If someone does, he takes it as a challenge to his gaining status. But he respects that person thereafter." She smiled lightly. "...Not that Neji-kun doesn't respect me. It's just... nice to be noticed as a woman instead of just a fighter sometimes, you know?"

Shikamaru was confused, which tended to happen when he talked to girls for too long. "Um, no. I'm not a girl." Tenten laughed lightly, adding to Shikamaru's bewilderment. As their food arrived, he decided maybe he'd just spend the day walking around... He needed to try to learn how _not _to think of the things that were enveloping his over-taxed mind.

...

The date had gone well so far, Temari struggling to free her mind and keep acting what would be normal for her. It was almost like the night before had been a story she had read somewhere, maybe a dream with a sour ending that left her feeling cold and unclean. But Shikamaru was right; she would eliminate him tomorrow, just like he wanted. Looking at him sleeping that morning, his dark hair dried messily around his face, soft and relaxed, had let her realize that she couldn't look at him anymore.

She and Neji had spent a majority of the day at the park, even training a bit, and she had all but pushed the Lazy Crybaby out of her head. Neji was leaning against the chain-link fence near a tennis court, his deep brown hair flowing in the light breeze of early evening as he looked peacefully at a sunset with her.

Temari sighed, pleasantly worn from all the exercise, and sat against the fence near Neji's feet. The Hyuga really was handsome, and attractive in his quiet way. It was rare she could enjoy time with someone but not have to listen to considerable yakking in the process. It made her feel peaceful, which she liked about Neji.

"That was interesting," Neji finally commented. Temari watched him close his eyes and smile in his manner. "What else did you have in mind for this evening?"

Temari smiled, appreciating how polite he was. "I thought maybe we might head back soon, actually, maybe watch a movie or something."

"Very well," Neji said softly. He really did have a nice voice. He pulled himself from the fence, putting his hand out politely to lift her from her spot. Temari took his hand with a grin, helping to pull herself upright. As she stood, Neji slyly placed his lips against hers.

Again Temari was impressed by his abilities, and she found herself kissing back eagerly.

"_... I can't watch them kiss you again..." _

Startled by the sudden soft voice in her mind, Temari jumped back. "Something wrong?" Neji asked, concerned.

Temari forced a smile on her face. "No, nothing," she sighed. "Just realized that we may miss that movie if we don't go soon."

Neji nodded. "I suppose you're right." He softly took her hand again, and the two began walking for the theater. It was clear and relatively warm, the slight breeze running through Temari's hair, which she wore in her characteristic ponytails today. Neji paused, bringing Temari to a pause as well, as a small white bird flew by.

"Hey, Neji-kun," Temari asked as they stared at the bird fly into a nest with two small birds visible inside it. "What exactly... would you do on our date...?" Neji turned his unreadable gaze to her. "...I mean, if you won?"

Neji paused, turning his head back to the bird. "I've... never really thought about that. More of this, I suppose..."

"Oh," she sighed, watching the birds and forgetting about the movie. "...Why did you enter this contest?"

Temari was never one to have problems being straightforward, and this was one of those times she just wanted to know. "...I mean, I really don't know that much about you."

Neji's gaze turned to the birds again. "All because of fate... My father was born a few moments too late, and so he, as well as any of his children, therefore myself, were assigned as protectors of the Main Branch." Temari knew very little about this, so was glad to have some comprehension on it. "...I recently discovered that my father was proud of the responsibility to protect his family, and that has eased my spirit somewhat, but..." Neji trailed off as the little white bird left the nest again to find some more food for her chicks. "...I want to be free."

Temari nodded, understanding dawning on her. "You're not sewn to that fate anymore, but you're not free, yet, either."

"Exactly," Neji replied as the two began walking again, this time toward the Inn; they had surely missed the last showing, and it was getting cool outside. "Although I hope you can excuse me from this..." Again, Temari was surprised about how polite the Hyuga seemed to be. "...any status change for the better can help my cause."

Temari nodded again. "And since I'm an ambassador..."

Neji turned to her, lightly running a hand across her cheek. "Please, do not feel that I do not enjoy spending time with you. You _are _a very strong and straightforward woman, and physically attractive, as well..."

Temari smiled lightly, looking up at the sky. The problem was, she _did _understand. That was how she had felt at times: trapped in responsibility she hadn't necessarily wanted to begin with, but now felt like she fit into. "...But?"

Neji's voice sounded a bit confused. "...'But?' I'm not sure I understand."

Why were men, even the geniuses, so stupid? "But wouldn't dating someone just for status place you in a different cage? Of expectations?" She could feel Neji's white eyes staring at her as she looked up at the sky. "...The clouds are turning gray..." she sighed quietly. "We should get back soon, before it rains."

...

Shikamaru woke up late again, though he had only really fallen asleep when Neji had gotten home that morning. He didn't want to hear how their date might have gone, let alone their night together. He felt a sharp pang in his stomach just thinking of it. So he had tried to catch up on his missed sleep that afternoon, blocking out everyone else and intending to sleep for quite a while. Maybe even through elimination. That would go well.

However, he found himself awake again as the other two were just finishing touching up for elimination. Too Troublesome. Why get dressed up for this?

Shikamaru rummaged through his clothes, his eyes lingering over his green Kimono and the small memory attached to it. But only for a moment. Shikamaru settled on a black t-shirt with some writing on it (a present from Chouji a few birthdays past, reading _I'm not stupid, just too lazy to care. _Naturally he had loved it) and a pair of somewhat ragged blue jeans; quite the difference from Neji's pressed white shirt and slacks and Tenten's magenta halter dress. He hastily pushed his hair up into a ponytail, not bothering to mess with a few strands that stuck out in the back from his carelessness.

It was odd to have elimination in a different spot, but apparently Temari had set things up here to look like the elimination room back at the house.

As Temari came in, he fought not to connect eyes with her, not to look at her lest he do something really... troublesome. Nevertheless, his eyes still kept moving to her. She looked relaxed again, and though Shikamaru knew that a geisha was not necessarily something good to look like, he couldn't help but mentally compare her to one. Her hair was folded intricately back in some womanly knot he couldn't comprehend, and her eyes, though he strained to avoid them, were painted with black, white, and the slightest hint of red. She wore a one-piece dress this time, black with scarlet embroidery, long draping sleeves and a flowing bottom splitting from an empire waist.

He had to stop looking at her. He had to get _that kiss _out of his mind. He had to leave.

"Things have changed here," Temari said softly. That soft voice; he didn't want to here her speak with that voice anymore, it was killing him. "When I started this, I just thought of it as one big joke. All of you had this shot at a date with me. I figured that, if worst came to worst, I could just take the single date at the end and forget about it. What I think I'm starting to realize, is that this isn't really just a shot at a date."

Shikamaru glanced up at her, confused yet again. Yet her eyes stayed away from him. It made him feel invisible, which was in fact what he had wanted all along...

...wasn't it?

"This has become a shot at love. I think. I'm starting to have actual feelings about this. And I don't think it's right to chain somebody in who doesn't want to be here."

Oh. Well, that was true. That was her cue to him. Shikamaru slouched his shoulders and looked at the bag at his feet. He really was going to leave this time.

"So... in that case..." she sighed lightly. "Neji-kun." Shikamaru wouldn't look up, but listened to Neji step forward. "I'm freeing you... from this."

Shikamaru looked up in shock to see the Hyuga bow and step away. Temari walked over to Tenten, placing a key on a string around her neck with a smile.

Then she walked over to Shikamaru. As she lifted a key for his own neck, he gently but firmly grabbed her wrist, though the contact threatened to make him explode. "Why are you doing this?" he asked, his voice low and serious.

Temari looked up at him, and their eyes connected for the first time since they had kissed. All of the feelings he had felt in that moment were flooding back in waves, but he managed to keep his eyes narrowed and lips away from hers. "I'm under certain rules in this competition. One of them being I can only pick one of you after _all _of this is finished, even if it seems obvious. The second being that I can only send one of you home tonight." Bewildered, he slowly released her wrist and felt the necklace fall around him.

It hadn't felt so heavy before.

Temari stepped slowly back, her eyes not leaving his. "Don't worry, crybaby," she sighed. "I did this for Neji-kun, not for you."

"...You really are getting feelings for these two, aren't you?" he asked, before he could rethink his words.

Temari fidgeted slightly, looking down. "I know it's not what you what expect of me, but yes. And Neji-kun's a good man and deserves to be free." She looked back up at him. His memory flashed involuntarily to the way she had looked in the rain, that light blue Kimono hugging her curves as her hair stuck to her frustrated face.

Shikamaru rolled his neck, pushing the image back. "...Whatever. You're so troublesome, Temari."

...

Author's Note: Geez, I kept wanting to end that chapter, but it kept going!! ...Sometimes these characters get minds of their own, take over my fingers, and want to keep typing. So troublesome.

At any rate, I hope I got a few happy ShikaTema fans, at least for that kiss. I tried to describe it in detail... partially because I, as a proper fangirl, enjoy re-reading it myself! :-D

Of course, those same fans probably want to hit Shika in the head a few times, too.

Seriously, when I adopt a character into my head for a round at a story (so I can try to make it more like them), I abuse them. A lot... Teehee, just ask Malchior about what I did to _him _in _A Dragon's Tear. _If this is how I treat my favorite characters, you all don't want to know how I treat the ones I can't stand. :) And yes, that was another shameless plug. (Read my other Fanfic! Revive it, please! It has been in hibernation so long...)

Oh, well, R&R, I'll write the next chapter, soon.


	7. LastShot PinaColadas & CaughtInTheRain

**Last Shot! Piña Coladas and Caught in the Rain**

Author's Note: Alright, it's a corny title. But it has a purpose, I swear. Then again, it does sort of have the same feel as a Japanese title, with the one exclamation point... oh, well.

In any event, I have been _waiting _for this chapter. Which I am actually attempting to wear my reading glasses to type; I will likely get a headache out of this. I at least get to type the parts I have been dieing to.

_Naruto _and _A Shot at Love with Tila Tequila _are not my creation, only this story merging one into the other is. I know it's not the first or last of its kind, but I hope it is at least a little unique.

I've been waiting to type these words, too: MATURE CONTENT WARNING. Teehee...

Without further ado, our feature presentation of _Last Shot! Piña Coladas and Caught in the Rain. _

...

Shikamaru was staring at the ceiling, yet again. Lying in the round bed (yet again), he was starting to wonder if he was ever going to be able to sleep well. He hoped so; otherwise he was fairly certain he might die. Yes, die. Sleep was one of his favorite hobbies, and lately he had been either deprived of it entirely or slept uneasily.

Tenten was sleeping quietly across from him, her feet pointed in his direction and the top of her body pointed away. This bed had seemed so big before, but now, Shikamaru might as well have been sleeping alone. His mind drifted back to sleeping next to Temari; the soft scent of her hair, the warmth of her in his arms as he had peacefully given into to sleep. Even if he had felt his heart wrench when he had said those words to her.

"_...Please... I can't watch them kiss you again... eliminate me tomorrow..."_

He started to wonder if maybe she had already been asleep when he said that. After all, he was still here.

Option B was that maybe she had been thinking about that kiss as much as he had. Which was ridiculous, of course; Shikamaru berated himself that he was probably a bad kisser. She had probably only kissed back in surprise, or maybe pity. And though it was his first kiss (even if he would never tell anyone that), he had thought it probably the best thing he had ever done. The worst decision, but the best kiss.

So Troublesome! Shikamaru had to keep his mind from reeling. He had to calm down and get some sleep. Careful not to wake Tenten, he slipped out of bed, pulling his hair up into a ponytail out of habit, and decided to get a snack from the kitchen to perhaps calm his nerves.

The first thing he noticed as he headed that direction was that a light was on. The second was that there was a bit of noise going on. Someone was awake, and there was really only one person it could be.

Using the limited shadows to his advantage, Shikamaru snuck to the doorway to watch Temari in quiet. She was wearing a white tank-top and a pair of black boy-cut shorts with the word "sexy" written across the back end. Those shorts always annoyed Shikamaru; how was any sensible person supposed to keep their eyes off words? Especially when the canvas was so... well-shaped.

Her back was to him, and she was messing with a few ingredients and a blender, potentially dangerous in that she couldn't seem to figure out how to get the lid to stay on. Shikamaru couldn't help but laugh when she turned the blender on and then had to quickly shut it off to prevent her concoction from spraying her.

She snapped around at the sound. "Oh! Shikamaru..." She bared him a frustrated look and turned her head back to her work. "I'm surprised to see you awake. What do you want?" she muttered with her back to him.

Shikamaru laughed lightly as he walked over to the counter behind her. Picking up a pineapple that had been left there, he pulled himself to sit on the aforementioned counter. "...What are you doing?" he drawled sleepily, passing the pineapple from one hand to the next.

"I asked you first," was the blonde's response as she tried the blender again. Unsuccessfully. "Dammit..."

"I was having some trouble sleeping," he started to explain. Temari looked over her shoulder at him, an eyebrow raised. "Hey, it happens," he retorted, "even to me. Anyway, so I thought I'd get a snack or something to get to sleep. So my question then: what are you doing?" Shikamaru started pulling bits of one of the pineapple's leaves off, unconsciously inspecting it.

"I'm trying... dammit..." Another failed attempt. "...To make a smoothie here."

"What kind?" he asked, carelessly holding the pineapple up to his eyes. It might make a good snack.

Temari spun around smoothly, drawing Shikamaru's eyes to a bottle in her hand and a grin on her lips. "The Piña Colada kind. Want one?"

Shikamaru smiled lightly, trying to draw his eyes away from her very visible, very toned thighs. "Not if you're making it. Might end up poisonous. If it doesn't end up all over the walls," he mumbled, indicating the now very empty blender.

Temari glared menacingly at him and snatched the pineapple out of his hands. "_I _need that," she snapped. She turned back to her counter, placed the pineapple down, and held a sharp knife towards its middle.

Shikamaru found himself quickly getting up and grabbing the hand with the knife from behind her. "You're going to hurt someone with that thing. Besides, you're supposed to take the crown off first." Trying to calm the burning feeling forming in his stomach from touching her hands, he decided to take the pineapple and knife from her and cut it himself.

"Sheesh, sorry," she muttered arrogantly. Then, softer: "Thanks, anyway. Usually all the pineapple I get comes pre-cut."

Shikamaru shrugged, now slowly cutting away the shell. "I just hope you don't try to cut the coconut like that. I don't know how to break one of those open."

Temari laughed, making the hairs on the back of his neck stand on end. "Oh, no." She gestured to the counter. "I found some cans for that ingredient." Suddenly she was laughing again, and Shikamaru glared up at her.

"What?" he groaned, cautious of the answer.

She smirk mischievously. "You know, with your hair up like that..." She gestured to his high ponytail. "All ragged and upright all the time... your _head _looks like a pineapple."

He groaned and rolled his eyes back to the cutting. "Troublesome woman," he muttered, deciding to ignore that comment. Shikamaru finished cutting the pineapple and slid the slices into the blender. He sniffed lightly at the remaining concoction, disapprovingly wrinkling his nose. "You might try adding a little more cream to it. Smells kind of strong."

"Oh, sure," she agreed, doing so. Shikamaru turned his back to the counter she was working at and leaned against it. He sort of felt that, for her safety, he had better supervise. She was struggling with the lid again. He sighed, grabbed at it and her hand in the process, twisted the lid, pressed, and heard it click, his hand aching as he pulled it away. He decided to throw away the uneatable parts of the pineapple. As he turned back to Temari, she was already pouring out the drinks into a couple glasses.

She handed one to Shikamaru, who sat back down on the counter to take a sip. She probably should have let it blend a little longer, but it was alright. He went back for another sip when Temari started singing to herself. "If you like Piña Coladas... getting caught in the rain..." Shikamaru raised an eyebrow at her when she trailed off. "What? That's all the words I know."

Shikamaru shrugged, going back to his drink. He didn't know anymore of the words, either. He ran into an unmixed bit of alcohol that hit him rather strongly. He felt his sinuses heat a bit, stopping to swish the drink in its glass.

"Um, Shikamaru," Temari muttered between sips of her own. "...Why... did you kiss me?"

Shikamaru was caught by surprise, but glad to have had the glass tilted over his face when asked. He slowly set the glass to the side and looked down at his knees. He had thought it might be asked eventually, but hadn't been ready for it. He sighed deeply and decided to stare at his feet instead of his knees. "...You kissed back."

He could feel Temari's eyes on him, but Shikamaru couldn't look back at her. He felt his hands clench lightly, frustrated at himself, as Temari took in an unsteady breath. "I... was caught in the moment, I guess... Plus, everyone's been kissing me..."

"Tch," Shikamaru groaned, fighting the desire to get mad at her reminder. "Yeah, okay." There was a long silence, Shikamaru struggling to get so many images and feelings out of his mind. Troublesome...

"You're not answering my question, Shikamaru."

"Because... well... _at the time... _I wanted to, okay?!" he snapped back, looking up at her. Temari was looking at him from over her Piña Colada, probably surprised to have seen him react so vehemently to something-- anything, for that matter. He had surprised himself at how his heart rate had suddenly jumped, but for one of the first times in his life, he wanted to keep talking, to get this off his chest. "You were cold, you were shivering, and you felt warm... in my arms..." The words were stalling again. Why did he always feel this way when it came to Temari?! Like he had to argue with her but to watch that his words never crossed certain undrawn lines. He pulled his gaze self-consciously to his hands, which now clenched each other in his lap. _Why _didn't he have any clue how to describe these feelings? ...So troublesome...!

"Shikamaru, stop," Temari finally said, and oddly enough, his throat stopped up, and he obeyed. Her voice had taken a commanding and distant tone that reminded him of his mother, and for habit he was silenced. "It was an odd moment, sure, but it was situational circumstance. We were caught in a moment, with the rain and all. Nothing more." Shikamaru looked up at Temari, whose eyes were focused and unyielding. He thought back to their first battle in the Chunin Exams, remembering the way her eyes had shaded darker as she was trying to calculate his moves. Of course, he had been ahead of her in calculations, but he could tell she was clever, nonetheless.

"...Nothing more," he felt himself repeating, though the words sounded far away. "Right, _situational circumstance. _An accident of coincidence, basically." A part of Shikamaru understood the words he had just said perfectly. Of course: that _would be_ the logical explanation.

A quieter part of Shikamaru thought the first part was an idiot. None of this made any sense... _He _was being the troublesome one here.

Temari nodded, slowly taking another sip. "So we're agreed, then. No more thinking on it."

"Yeah, sure," the Shadow Controller sighed, getting up and laying his glass in the sink and muffling the second voice in his own mind. "It was nothing... Everything's like it was before..." Shikamaru started heading out of the kitchen, suddenly incredibly tired. "...If you like Piña Coladas..." he sang absentmindedly.

Troublesome song was stuck in his head.

"...getting kissed in the rain..."

...

"You've got to be _kidding _me, Hokage-sama!!" Temari just _barely _resisted the urge to slam her hands on the blond Sannin's desk, clenching her hands tightly at her sides instead. "I've already told you that I made my choice! Why continue this nonsense?! I mean, really, there's only the two of them, and Shikamaru only got this far out of circumstance..."

Tsunade folded her own hands together in front of her face, trying to remain calm despite the twitch beginning to form on her eyebrow. "You still have the rest of this week to play out in that house... that's the deal."

The Suna Ambassador crossed her arms and glared daggers at her. "I just don't understand why we can't stop early, or send Shikamaru home, or something..."

Tsunade sighed, leaning back in her chair. "Mrs. Nara would never allow Shikamaru to leave unless actually eliminated; I've already spoken to her at Shikamaru's request." Temari raised an eyebrow, pushing back a small pang. When had Shikamaru asked Tsunade about that? "...And as for ending early... We've already paid the people who set up your little house and who are preparing your meals."

Temari's jaw dropped, and her voice stalled a moment. "...this... you..." It didn't take long for understanding to dawn. "THIS IS ABOUT MONEY?!"

Tsunade placed a palm down quickly against her desk, which sub sequentially led deep cracks to radiate from the impact point all the way down the sides, and even a bit into the floorboards. "_Watch your volume with __**me**__," _Tsunade menaced through clenched teeth.

"Y-yes, Hokage-sama," Temari quickly corrected. She beat herself up for making the mistake of yelling at the Hokage; no matter how well they may usually get along, and no matter how strong Temari felt about herself, it would just be pure idiocy to escalate an argument with Tsunade. "... But I really don't... I mean, of all the... why _this _contest? If I already chose the winner and all..."

The Fifth Hokage's face softened; obviously she realized that Temari would not make that mistake again. Tsunade calmly placed her hands back together, as Temari let her gaze fall to a chunk of wood falling morosely off one of the desk's panels. "I think it would be interesting to see how much creativity the two finalists can muster up, don't you?"

Not really, but Temari didn't say that aloud.

...

"...Hey, Mom."

"Shikamaru!" The Lazy Ninja pulled the phone apprehensively from his ear as Nara Yoshino happily cooed. "I'm so happy you're still seeing things through in that contest... how's Temari-san?"

Shikamaru winced. He _knew _that _she _knew he wanted to go home, but Tsunade's relayed response from his request had been very firm. Shikamaru knew that bringing it up directly with his mother would just bring havoc. "She's all right, I guess... How's things at home?" he responded, trying to change the subject.

"Oh, same as always..." Shikamaru thought he could almost see her roll her eyes. "You know your father."

He raised an eyebrow. "Yeah... what kind of trouble did he get into, now?" More importantly, Shikamaru was wondering if he might have to sleep outside when he came back home-- if his father had been really troublesome, his mom would still take out some of it on him.

"Oh, he's behaving well," Yoshino responded coolly, much to Shikamaru's relief. "I was just curious, though-- how'd your last contest go? I hope you're managing some effort into this, Shikamaru. It would be very good for the family for you to go on that date with Temari-san, and you know how fondly I think of her."

Yeah, of course; both were scary, troublesome women. "It went okay, Mom..." Shikamaru longed to change the subject, not wanting to think of it any longer. But he knew, unfortunately, his mother wouldn't allow it.

"_Okay? _Shikamaru, that's not a description... What was the contest?"

Troublesome, meddlesome woman. "Temari took everyone out on individual dates--"

"And what happened on yours?"

"--Uh... um... well, we visited a temple. I played Shogi a while..." Shikamaru trailed off as the memories flooded back, stronger than ever: Temari's hands trailing softly across his chest as he wrapped his arms around her, their mouths interlocked... "Uh, Mom?" he finally muttered, his voice sounding a bit higher than he had intended. "I don't really want to talk about it..."

"I see..." Yoshino's voice was softer, and Shikamaru desperately wished he hadn't let his voice jump so suddenly. "...Shikamaru, don't lie to me about this. How do you feel about her, plain and simple?"

Shikamaru was at a loss for words. How did he feel? It should have been a rather simple answer, shouldn't it? Temari was THE most troublesome woman he had ever met: she was over-aggressive, usually un-ladylike... Shikamaru sighed as he realized he couldn't think of any worse words, and each word he _could _think of had a synonym that fit better: Confident. Strong. Outgoing. Clever. And those were just her personality. Now that Shikamaru thought about it, Temari's blond hair was sporty and fun. Her eyes were soft but not stupid; her body was fit, athletic but curved...

Dammit, why couldn't he think of the bad things about her anymore? "Mom, I... I don't know."

"Uh-huh. So you want to lie to me?"

Shikamaru sighed, helpless in defeat. "Okay, okay... I guess... I sort of..." Shikamaru did a double take to make sure no one was watching or listening. "...Well, I guess a date with Temari wouldn't be such a drag."

Shikamaru rolled his eyes as he heard his mother stifle a squeal. Troublesome. "So, then, Shikamaru, what's the next contest? Have you figured out how to win, yet?"

There was a potential problem. Now that Shikamaru had... sort of... admitted the way he felt, he really did... _Could _he actually win? "Temari announced it earlier... we're supposed to arrange the dates this time. A dinner date, and we have to arrange some kind of gift to give her on this date, for her to decide through..." Dammit, Shikamaru actually had no idea what to do. If his Dad got in trouble with his Mom, he always managed to know how they could cheer his mom up again, with flowers or jewelry or something. But Temari was a bit of a tomboy, sometimes, and Shikamaru had a feeling he would have to do a lot more than buy a bouquet if he wanted to win this.

"Okay, then," Yoshino responded, a smile audible in her voice. "In that case, it's a good thing you called me. Talk this out with me, and we'll make a nice plan..."

...

Temari checked over herself in the mirror one more time, adjusting the straps on her simple gold bikini. Tenten said to meet her for their date by the pool, so she wanted to make sure she looked nice. This was going to be a dinner that Tenten herself had prepared, and Temari felt anxious about what it might be. By the pool? Well, she was going to wear a swimsuit then and was happy that it _was _a warm night.

Temari's eyes widened as she reached the pool; Tenten had set up a dinner table, complete with a silky black looking tablecloth and a nice looking meal. Temari couldn't help but let her jaw drop a bit as Tenten appeared with a black one piece that wrapped around her rather than flow smoothly top to bottom.

"Dinner's ready," the darker haired Kunoichi smiled, pulling out a chair.

Temari bowed her head in a light thank you as she took her seat, then stared at the food that had been prepared. Tenten had obviously prepared a Chinese dish that Temari didn't really recognize: it resembled something between a wonton (which she had seen before) and a taco. It smelled good though, and a couple little bowls of rice and a sauce she didn't recognize were nearby.

Tenten took her seat with a smile, obviously collecting Temari's confusion from her expression. "It's Jiaozi, Chinese dumplings. It's boiled, but then I fried it because that makes them a bit crispier. They can be plain, but these ones have Shiitake, pork, and a couple veggies. The sauce is for dipping, its pretty much just soy sauce, vinegar, and sugar."

Temari nodded, nervously picking up a Jiaozi with her chopsticks, dipping it lightly in the sauce, and taking a cautious bite. She was surprised. "Wow! This is really good!"

Tenten laughed lightly as Temari began to eat a bit faster. "Well, thanks... I'm glad you think so. They tend to be a good hit when I make them for my teammates... Though Neji-kun thinks the sauce is too sweet."

"I like the sauce; it's not bad, either, makes it sort of kick," Temari added. Not as good as she thought the dumplings were in Konoha's specialty shops, but these _were _more for a dinner whereas those made good desserts.

Tenten began to eat, and in a short span of time, they had cleared out almost all the dumplings. Temari took up one of the pretty red fabric napkins that had been set. "Do you mind if I wrap one and save it? These really are good," she asked.

Tenten nodded. "Sure. And you can have some at another time, too, if you like," she answered, blushing lightly. "Just have to ask and give me a bit of time to do it, assuming I don't have a mission or anything."

Temari nodded, appreciating the offer. "Yeah, I know you train a lot."

"Well, I still have to beat you, you know."

Temari grinned mischievously as she wrapped the last two. "We'll see about that. I still train, too, so I don't know if you'll be up to it." She looked up to see Tenten grinning similarly.

"I think you'll find a lot of my training has advanced quite a bit. Neji-kun and I..." Tenten trailed off a moment, then closed her eyes in an expression that Temari mentally noted as a mimicry of one of the aforementioned Hyuga's own expressions. "I shouldn't tell you about training; it would ruin the next battle we have." Temari grinned her toothy agreement, as Tenten pushed herself up from the table. "Well, we should get to the next part of our date, then, shouldn't we?"

Temari stood up as well, wiping her mouth with another napkin. "Okay. What's the plan, then?"

Tenten walked gracefully around the table, taking Temari's hand in her own. "This way..." Temari walked alongside Tenten as the two walked to an area surrounded by partially transparent black curtains. Tenten released Temari's hand with a smile and a wink, then pulled the curtains back. Temari was agape once again when she saw the ready hot tub waiting, complete with many light blue and pink candles around the side.

"I heard how much you liked the hot springs," Tenten smiled, slipping into the tub and sitting on one of the underwater ledges. "So I thought this might be the next best thing."

Temari smiled back. "It's beautiful. Thank you." Then she slipped into the tub as well, enjoying the hot water and the romantic setting. She pulled herself close to Tenten, wrapping an arm around her waist. She placed a light kiss on Tenten's lips, who lightly wrapped her own arms around Temari's shoulders. After a short moment the two separated, and Temari could feel a blush hiding beneath the rising heat from the hot tub.

"Oh!" Tenten said suddenly, stretching across to find a small red bag. Temari sat down on the ledge next to her as Tenten handed over the bag. "We're supposed to get you a present, right? I hope you like it."

The blond Kunoichi pushed back the bits of pink tissue paper and pulled out a small bottle. "What's this?"

Tenten looked down into the water. "It's a blade polish. I use it for my ninja tools, and I thought..."

"It's perfect! This should be great for my fan. Thanks, again." Temari placed the bottle back into its bag and set it aside. She smiled lightly. "This has been very nice, Tenten-chan. I'm glad you're still here." She leaned towards Tenten, pulling her into a deeper kiss. As she pulled away, she caught some water trickling down Tenten's face. "Um... is something wrong?"

"Wha--? Oh!" Tenten wiped the tear quickly away. "Nothing, just the steam, I guess."

Temari smiled. It made sense; she did find herself to have started sweating. "Well, we won't spend too much time in here then... We did just eat and all..."

...

Shikamaru did one final look over in the mirror. He had recycled the white collared men's shirt and black slacks from a previous date, but hopefully Temari wouldn't notice. Besides, this time he had ironed the clothes, and wore black shoes that, while pinching his toes from years of no use, matched very well. He had pulled his hair back like normal, but had paid special attention to making it look well-kempt.

He was still a bit surprised by his own actions. Shikamaru had set up everything in what he hoped would be a last moment but effective effort. He was _trying _at this. Why? Why bother with all this troublesome _work, _one of the things he strived to avoid his whole life? It took his mother pestering him for him to realize the answer.

He liked Temari.

He overlooked the room one last time, adjusting things to look balanced, all the time wondering: would such effort so late in the game be effective? He had tried everything short of flat-out insulting Temari to get a pass home, and now he wanted to-- though he still couldn't admit it except to himself-- win.

Motivation always was troublesome.

Shaking himself to the present, Shikamaru waited in the front room for Temari, allowing his mind to wander aimlessly... Would she realize his feelings? Would she laugh in the Lazy Ninja's face? Would he have the gall to say something, when his throat suddenly felt so tight? ...What would Temari wear that night?

One of the answers to his questions was quickly solved, in a way that made Shikamaru's head spin. Temari arrived in a resplendent emerald green summer dress that raised to a halter tie behind her neck. Her hair was tied in her infamous four pigtails, but Shikamaru grinned at seeing something so familiar.

"Well, Lazy Crybaby," the Suna Kunoichi smirked. "Let's see what you've cooked up."

Shikamaru mirrored her smirk and bowed in the manner of an usher. "Right this way." Not stopping to shyness, he took both her hands in his and walked backwards toward the room he had in mind. Temari's eyebrow raised as he fought not to break eye contact, like his mother had advised him. "Dinner is served," he smiled softer, opening the door.

Shikamaru knew Temari would recognize it as the "Heaven" room, though he had done some minor rearrangements. A short Japanese dinner table was covered with a soft white cloth, and he had pulled the various white furniture to surround it for comfortable seating. He had also taken advantage of several white candles and draped white curtains from the ceiling. Shikamaru _knew _how to set up a decent apology dinner for his parents, and with someone as talented as his mother on his side, he could really accomplish something. When he wanted to, anyway.

And he wanted to, as troublesome as this whole thing was.

"W-wow," Temari stuttered, her eyes wide as she stared. Shikamaru smirked to himself, gaining up some willpower as he continued to lead her by her hands to the table. Temari seemed at a loss for words, which Shikamaru noted as rare as he sat next to her. After a short moment of taking everything in, Temari finally spoke a few additional syllables. "This is... really nice."

"Yeah, well," Shikamaru started in mock modesty; even he had been impressed with the end results. "I thought it would be nice, to show a little bit of effort, you know..." He looked towards the center of the table as he began to serve some spaghetti. He had been so busy fixing the room, this was the best he could manage for food, but he hoped it would be okay. "...Just to prove I can."

Temari grinned, and Shikamaru felt the tug in his throat again that he had felt when she had looked into his eyes under the rain. It seemed so long ago, now. "Then I stand corrected. Looks like you _do _have a little motivation in you. Happy I could concede you that much?" She started to eat her spaghetti, careful not to let the red sauce drip on the white table cloth.

"I guess," he grinned back, eating his own food. Troublesome-- he should have focused on the food more. It was fairly bland. He went to his side and pulled out his small package from beneath the cushions. "Here," he sighed, handing it casually to her. "It's troublesome, but it was in the rules."

"Thanks," Temari muttered, and Shikamaru turned back to his spaghetti as she opened it. She let out a small sigh as she finished, and Shikamaru grinned to himself. "...A key-chain? Honestly, Shikamaru, this is lazy, even for you."

Shikamaru pushed himself onto his back, putting his arms behind his head as he lay back on the cushions. "It's got a pocket. Look in there." He closed his eyes, waiting as she did so. "That's my phone number." There was a long pause, and Shikamaru wasn't sure if he wanted to see Temari's face. "I know you and I agreed on circumstance... And you and Tenten are getting so close... I just think... maybe... if things get troublesome for you, you can call me. To talk." He peered one eye open, and Temari was staring at him, her mind obviously calculating.

"I know, it's pretty dumb. And we fight. But we... can be friends, right?" Suddenly Shikamaru didn't feel so confident as he had before. Temari was still staring at him, and he couldn't read what her expression meant. Which irritated him. A lot. Shikamaru began to pull himself up into a sitting position.

He never made it all the way up.

Temari threw her arms around Shikamaru's shoulders, pushing him back down. Her lips pressed against his, and in one glorious half moment, he was kissing her back avidly. This kiss was different then the one in the rain had been. Temari pulled herself on top of Shikamaru, and he desperately pulled her closer. Their tongues were battling as his hands moved to her waist. She tasted better than he had remembered, and he could feel his body reacting to the pressure of her hips against his own.

He let out a light moan as Temari's hands pulled frantically at the buttons of his shirt, and he nimbly found his fingertips guiding her to undoing his shirt's buttons. Her softness pressed through the silken fabric of her dress against his now bare chest. His hands moved agilely to her toned thighs as she let out her own moan though the kiss didn't break. Her soft hands traveled expertly across his chest, not softly but in a frenzy. Shikamaru _knew _Temari could feel him hardening to her touch, to her kiss, as their hips pushed together _almost _painfully begging to meet.

Temari's lips curled into a light smile through the kiss, as her hands skirted teasingly around the edge of his pants. Shikamaru pushed his hands further up her thighs, gripping at her healthy behind and wishing her lacy underwear weren't in the way. Slowing ever so slightly, his grip loosened, and he trailed his fingertips to the meeting place of her thighs, his heart rate pounding. Temari was wet, and the hotness of her body's reactions could be felt through the underwear as he rubbed his hand against her.

The two broke for a simultaneous moan as her grip landed between his own legs. There was no hiding it now; Shikamaru felt so hard he was afraid he might explode, and his body _wanted _to, in ways he had never thought imaginable. Their bodies grinded together as each rubbed the other sensually. Though the clothing still blocked full contact, Shikamaru's mind was elsewhere, imagining her wetness _surrounding _him.

"Sh...Shikamaru..."

Temari's moan somehow jolted him into awareness. He _barely _managed to pull himself back enough to break the kiss and pry his hands off her. She looked hesitantly at him for the first time since the kiss had begun. Her eyes were _so _soft, and Shikamaru wanted to stare into them forever, to let himself forget every semblance of the reality of the situation bearing down upon him.

He pulled his gaze away somehow, staring at a flame flickering on a candle nearby as their heated, rapid breath began to pace. He could still feel that fire burning just below his navel as Temari pulled herself off him.

"S...Sorry..." he sighed, finally, not thinking what else to say. What was he... what would have happened if...?

"I started it..." Temari's voice answered through a shaky sigh.

There was a long moment of silence, and Shikamaru wasn't sure he could move for fear he start kissing her again... He hadn't wanted things to go that far... _but it felt so good... _

"...Thank you," Temari muttered softly. "F...For the key-chain."

Shikamaru's face snapped back to look at her. What was she playing at? "...You're welcome... Temari, what--"

Temari interrupted him with a loud sigh, looking away and at her still rather full plate. "...I should go."

"T-Temari..."

"_What, _Shikamaru?" she snapped back, her eyes turning back to him with a strange look. "That-- whatever it was--"

"I think you _know _what it was, Temari--" he snapped back, his chest starting to hurt.

"Arrgh!" She cried in frustration. "It was NOTHING, Shikamaru! It was a mistake! You and I just don't match! I don't know why these coincidences keep-- these circumstances--"

Shikamaru sat up, surprisingly agile. "_Coincidences? Circumstance? _Dammit, Temari, how long are you going to use that excuse?!"

"It's not an excuse!" She pulled herself to her feet. "I-- I don't know _what _this is! But you expect me to-- after all-- Arrgh!"

Shikamaru reacted before his brain could catch up. He stood up, following her attempt at running and grabbing her wrist two degrees below harshly, pushing his lips desperately against hers.

Before a sharp smack ranged across his cheek.

He looked taken aback at Temari, whose fists were clenched angrily at her sides. Her eyes were wide and searching him over, her skin still ablaze with passion and anger.

Shikamaru rolled his eyes. "You... Troublesome... woman..." He muttered, rubbing a hand against the now sore cheek. "...Why do you have to fight _everything?" _

"Tch!" Temari snorted. "Why do you have to be so... so... Arrgh!"

"Some answer," he snapped back, his voice sounding colder than usual.

"I hate you."

Shikamaru felt his eyes water as he glared back at her, the words dripping with malice from her lips. Not here. Not now. He wouldn't cry in front of her.

So Shikamaru just stared. Temari stared at him another short instant, than ran out the door, slamming it behind her.

"I HATE YOU, TEMARI!" he yelled back.

Then Shikamaru fell to his knees, and let his tears fall.

...


	8. Elimination

**Elimination. **

A's/N: Characters and Original reality show, not mine. Situation pushing characters _into _reality show, my doing.

...

**Sometimes, things are arranged in odd ways. **

"_You wanted a way to get to know the Konoha folk, and a date is just the thing that will do it. So we've decided to make it a little more interesting, with a sort of competition so that you can choose someone you'll actually get along with for a set period time." _

**Fate decides to conveniently place two people near each other who, in any normal instance, would only minimally get along. **

"_...What are you doing here?"_

"_Trying to nap."_

"_No, Lazy Ass, I know that! I mean, why are you involved in this contest? Don't you have somewhere you'd rather be?"_

"_Yeah, I sure do. But my MOTHER seems to think I need to get a girlfriend, and this is a good way to meet girls, according to her. Even though I know everybody already. So the plan is for you to just eliminate me real quick, okay, and you won't have to deal with me and I'll be scotch-free until my mother's next... IDEA." _

**Fate would rather complicate things incredibly then just tell hormones, emotions, and destiny to get in line and do what was meant to be. **

"_I was here first. You asked for a spot to sit and that doesn't mean I have to give up my place to lie down." _

"_Didn't your Mother teach you to let Ladies have a nice seat?"_

"_My mother got me into this mess. Besides, you're more like a Demon than a lady." _

**Through all of this, sooner or later there is a test. By this time, the two people have realized just enough, maybe they could look out for one another... **

"_...It's about Ino-chan and Kiba-kun... See, I think... They're involved."_

_**...**_**even if things may not go as planned. **

"_I can't believe you, Shikamaru... I don't know what you're thinking, but I guess I shouldn't have told you what I was." _

"_You--What?! I wouldn't lie about something like this, Temari!" _

"_Get out of here, Shikamaru, your time's up."_

"_TEMARI--"_

"_OUT!"_

**Still, though they argue, the two soon realize that they've ended up as partners in something. They may not understand it at all, but a silent agreement is reached: between these two, while there may be secrets, there will not be lies. This is taken as a straight fact that both feel towards the other. **

"_You were... telling the truth...?" _

**Though the two would have normally gone their own ways, a small friendship is formed. An agreement is reached to stay apart, but fate steps in yet again to make sure the plot continues to roll. **

_"I'm going to let you go home tonight... so you can relax about the contest. It's not about any teams this time anyway." _

_"Thanks. I've been wanting to go home for a while." _

"_...__**Wait**__. Um... I think... I want to pass."_

**Finally, the inevitable happens. Accident or purpose, neither is clear. But somehow, someway, there is a spark ignited that fate had wanted all along. **

_He could feel her breath meeting his, could feel the warmth of her lips only millimeters from his own. And he pulled forward. _

**Try as the two might to douse this small flame... **

"_It was an odd moment, sure, but it was situational circumstance. We were caught in a moment, with the rain and all. Nothing more."_

"_...Nothing more... Right, situational circumstance. An accident of coincidence..." _

_**...**_**it's just going to erupt into passion before long. The human willpower only holds so much status over the desires of the body. **

_...Her lips pressed against his, and in one glorious half moment, he was kissing her back avidly. This kiss was different then the one in the rain had been. Temari pulled herself on top of Shikamaru, and he desperately pulled her closer... She tasted better than he had remembered... his body reacting to the pressure of her hips against his own..._

**But the end result of any fire around so many ignitable factors is the same: an explosion is produced. **

"_I hate you." _

"_I HATE YOU, TEMARI!" _

**Things are said that burn. Enemies fight. Human nature pushes people apart when they can't get along, acting upon ancient laws of fight or flight. Friends fight as a result of natural competition from a "survival of the fittest" standpoint. The one thing that never makes sense is simple in idea but complicated in explanation. Couples fight, too. Though nature would push them together for survival, why do couples eventually want to rip each other's throat out just for twenty seconds of peace, but want to love each other tenderly at the same time? **

**Fate-- what a drag.**

...

Temari sighed, looking over her things. In a little while or so, she would be leaving this house for good, and she had packed her belongings slowly before elimination. She wondered what had happened to herself. Subaku no Temari was cold, calculated, heartless. Feminine, yes, but this? How could she have let herself react? She had always pushed her emotions aside, in true Shinobi fashion.

If she delicately guarded her heart, she could never feel it break.

Now, looking in the mirror, her long-missed black kimono wrapped around her body, she saw a woman staring back. Temari knew she had matured physically a few years before; the effects were obvious, though a bit frightening at first. This was different. She had fallen to her heart, which was a mistake. Now she could cover her heart in layers again, having learned her lesson. _That _was the maturity she now felt. The maturity to realize how she was meant to be:

Alone.

...

Shikamaru felt as though his clothes were a bit too tight. Had it really been so long since he had donned the green vest of one who surpassed Genin status? Surely he hadn't grown that much in such a short time.

Everything seemed like a dream now as he glanced at Tenten. She was wearing her usual white mandarin top over her deep magenta pants, and she smiled lightly at him. Shikamaru rolled his shoulder and slid his hands to his pockets. Leaning back and looking at the sky, he realized this was probably a perfect night weather-wise. The stars were clear and bright, not too warm or humid. The air still carried the scent of that morning's rain, and Shikamaru knew a few strands of damp grass clung to his toes through his ninja sandals. Troublesome. But it probably would remain clear the rest of the night.

It was only a short instant before Temari arrived.

...

Temari walked calmly past the candles that lined the walkway to the glass platform that had been raised as a standing point over the pool. It would be best to get this over with.

She stopped in front of Tenten and Shikamaru before she would glance up at them. Her eyes met Shikamaru's first, but she hastily pulled them away. Looking at Tenten instead, she smiled lightly. Tenten looked back at her with a soft smile, and Temari nodded her acknowledgement of it before she began to speak.

"This shot at _love..._" Her lips cringed at the word. "...Is about to end for one of you. After this, I will have a date with the other. I can't say if it will end up being a relationship, but... what it _will _be is an extended shot."

Temari pulled her eyes to the ground, looked at the water softly glistening beneath their feet. "So, I knew this was a decision I would have to make. I just didn't know..." She sighed, pulling her gaze back up to the two. "...There's no use delaying this any longer. Only one of you still has a shot at love... And the one I choose is..."

"...Tenten."

...

Shikamaru slightly stumbled back as Temari pulled Tenten into a kiss. Why, he wasn't sure. Had he thought, even for a moment, that Temari would have...

No. There was never a chance of her choosing him.

He forced a smile in the direction of the two Kunoichi, who were kissing slowly, and backed away. Turning around, he walked slowly back past the candles. What had he expected? Shikamaru finally had gotten what he wanted. He would get his things, go home, and pretend none of this ever happened.

As he reached the end of the walkway, Shikamaru paused. No, he could pretend all he wanted, but he knew he would never be the same. In just one word, he had felt his heart torn out, and it felt like he was choking. It didn't make any sense-- this was what he had _WANTED_!

...Why did it hurt so much?

As he stared at the sky, he found himself almost positive it would rain, after all.

...

Temari pulled herself from Tenten's embrace, her mind racing as she looked into the younger Kunoichi's eyes. Tenten was smiling, but tears were streaming down her face.

"_Feelings are strange things. You go so long feeling one way, and get pretty determined that that's the only way you know. Then something comes along, and you finally realize you're not going to get anywhere, so you try to change. Even though the way you felt to begin with sits under the surface forever." _

Before she knew what she was doing Temari had pulled away from Tenten. She'd never let her legs carry her so quickly before. She was suddenly thinking of every second just her hands had touched Shikamaru's, of how she had burned when in his arms, and her heart felt like it was certainly bleeding. She barely recognized her voice:

"Shikamaru! SHIKAMARU! _WAIT!"_

...

It had to have been his mind playing tricks on him, hearing Temari's voice calling out his name, but as he turned, the blond sand Kunoichi landed firmly in his arms. His eyes widened, but his arms knew to wrap around her shoulders.

Temari was crying, and not delicately. She let out little sobs, almost childlike as she clung to his chest. He couldn't think of anything to say, but kept repeating: "it's okay. It's okay, Temari."

"Shi...Shikamaru..." she sobbed, the hole in his chest aching at hearing his name, and at Temari feeling so vulnerable in his arms. Subaku no Temari, perhaps the scariest, most troublesome woman on the planet, was a _woman. _And she was crying, for what Shikamaru was certain was his fault. All he wanted was her to feel better, to say something smart to her, maybe a bit funny, maybe to make her mad because that was the way he knew her best.

But all he could do was hold her.

"Shikamaru..." she sighed, when her tears could no longer flow, and she pulled herself upright to look at him. Temari's eyes were still moist, and Shikamaru just stared at her, so she knew she would have to speak. "...I know... this is what you wanted..."

"...I was an idiot..." he whispered, surprised he could find any breath.

"...Shikamaru, please," she mumbled, and the two exchanged an odd smile as Shikamaru's hands rested lightly on her cheeks. "...I'm talking, here..."

Shikamaru laughed nervously. "Troublesome woman."

"Lazy Crybaby."

They stood there in silence a moment. But only a moment. Soon Temari fell back into his arms, softly speaking aloud what had struggled to pull itself from its guarded position in her heart.

"I made a mistake... I want a shot at love... with you... I'm in love with you... idiot..."

Shikamaru's hold on her tightened casually, and he felt the hole in his chest overflow with warmth.

"So troublesome... I love you, too, Temari."

...

THE END

And THAT, ladies and gentleman, is all.


End file.
